


When life takes a turn

by imera



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Cheating, Dubious Consent, F/M, Manipulation, Pregnancy, Threats
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-11-30
Updated: 2011-11-30
Packaged: 2018-03-30 12:42:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 28,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3937183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imera/pseuds/imera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hermione is unhappy with her life. She is persuaded to pursue a new career which turns out to be a life changing decision.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is an old story I wrote in 2011, it's probably far from great or perfect, but I want to add it here with the rest of my stories.

Hermione threw the Daily Prophet against the wall and stared into the opposite direction. It had been three weeks since she’d quit her job, three long weeks where no interesting job positions had been posted in the Prophet. It had also been five years since the fall of Voldemort, five long years where people had attempted to restore Wizarding society back to its former glory.

Hermione, Ron, and Harry joined the Auror training program after the defeat of Voldemort and the successful endeavour of capturing hundreds of Death Eaters and Snatchers. But after five years of drudgery, Hermione couldn’t take the demands of her job any more and decided to quit. Both Ron and Harry had been shocked; why would she ever want to leave such an exciting job? She wasn’t quite sure herself. Maybe she had grown up? She only knew that she didn’t enjoy being the ‘good guy’ any more. There had been too many expectations to live up to.

Her decision to quit had put a damper on their friendship, especially between Hermione and Ron. She didn’t know how much more their relationship could take. As always, Ron was unable to understand her point of view on the matter and that had led to arguments over who was right in all matter of things. Sometimes she wondered if the brilliancy he had shown during the final battle had only been a one-time stroke of luck.

She knew that with her prestige, she could easily walk into any office anywhere in Wizarding Britain asking for a job, and she would receive one, even if they didn’t have a position open. She knew it could be that easy. But the thing was, she didn’t want to have it easy. She wanted the perfect job. 

That was another issue she would have to face. She had absolutely no idea what kind of job she wanted. May was coming to an end and she knew that if she didn’t find a job, she would need at least an apprenticeship. If she didn’t hurry, they would all be taken. It was still May, and she knew that most of the available spots would be gone by the middle of July, which left her with barely a month and a half to decide her future. 

When Ron walked into the room ten minutes later, she was still staring at the empty wall, lost in her own thoughts. Ron took one look at the newspaper that was spread on the floor and knew instantly what had happened. It hadn’t been the first time Hermione had brutally thrown the paper, and most likely not the last time, either. He didn’t know what to do or how to deal with her so instead of fulfilling his responsibilities, he retrieved the paper from the floor and walked into their shared bathroom. 

As the door closed behind him, Hermione could feel her emotions boil at once. He had walked straight past her without even a small hello. That was why their relationship wasn’t going well. Ron didn’t seem to care about what she had to struggle with. He always said he didn’t want to start another fight, but ignoring her was not the way to avoid fights.

Maybe Luna was right, some relationships weren’t meant to last. 

Hermione stood up from the chair and walked into the bathroom where Ron was preparing a bath. “Don’t you care at all?”

Ron stared at her with big confused eyes. No wonder women thought men were insensitive. “What do you mean?”

“You didn’t even say hello to me when you entered the room.”

“What was I supposed to do? If I opened my mouth you would tell me how confused and annoyed you are, and then start complaining at how you don’t know what you want to work with, and how nothing seems to go the way you want it to go,” he babbled. 

Hermione was both angry and sad, and while she could have said numerous hurtful things, she decided to leave the room, instead. She knew Ron hated fighting, but that didn’t mean he shouldn’t try and calm her down. Before he had a chance to react, she decided to head over to Luna’s. 

Luna always knew how to calm Hermione down. Before the last battle, Hermione had always thought she was strange, but as time passed, and she got to know the girl, she found Luna to be comforting and helpful. 


	2. Chapter 2

When she finally returned that evening, she found the apartment dark and empty. She knew Ron had probably headed over to Harry’s. Every time they faced a problem, he would seek help from his best friend, or his sister Ginny. She waited for hour, but had to give up waiting for him when the clock struck midnight. She knew he wouldn’t be returning that evening.

Patiently, she waited for his return the next day. She prepared a cake in case he decided to return at dinnertime, but Ron didn’t return until late that night.

She lowered the book she had been reading when he entered the apartment and waited for him to sit down next to her like he usually did. What happened instead wasn’t something new, but it still surprised her. He didn’t look at her. Instead, he walked straight past her into the bathroom. She sat in silence and listened to him brushing his teeth and preparing himself for bed. When he finally opened the door to the living room, she thought he would finally say something, but instead he walked straight past her into their bedroom.

Because it was late, she knew it would be both stupid and rude to knock on Luna’s door, even if Luna thought it was perfectly normal. And because she didn’t want to sleep on the uncomfortable sofa, which Ron had wanted to buy, she walked into the bathroom and prepared herself for bed, knowing full well that they would not sleep close that night.

The next morning, she woke up to an empty bed and the sound of the front door closing. Hermione wondered how they had reached this point in their relationship, where they were avoiding each other at all costs. After she returned from Luna’s, she was prepared to forgive him for behaving like he had. She was prepared to tell him exactly what he wanted to hear, just so the fighting would stop.

When she was done eating breakfast, she sat down on the sofa and continued reading her book when she was disrupted by someone knocking on her door. She wondered who it could be. Perhaps Harry had come to apologize for Ron’s behaviour, like he always did, or perhaps Luna wanted to make sure she was alright. So when she opened the door and saw Neville outside her apartment, she was pleasantly surprised.

She thought Neville had come for a friendly visit, so when she learned the reason for his visit, she was once again surprised. Apparently, Luna told him of Hermione’s difficulties in choosing and occupation, and that had got him thinking.

“I know you’re having a difficult time and I would like to offer you a position at Hogwarts.”

The first thing Hermione wanted to do was to refuse because of two reasons. After being a private tutor for both Harry and Ron back in their school days, she didn’t particularly find teaching fun any more. Also, because she didn’t believed teaching was her call, she needed something more challenging than students.

But she never had a chance to voice her concerns because Neville simply barrelled on with his proposition. “I won’t take no for an answer, and neither will Minerva. I mean, McGonagall. I talked with McGonagall and we both agree you should accept that position. And you will be able to choose between being a teacher in Charms, Defence against the Dark Arts, or Transfiguration. Much of our staff is retiring this year and we’re low on proper teachers.” Neville had turned into a strong and determined man, who had brought honour and pride to Godric Gryffindor’s name.

“I don’t know what to say.” She was about to tell him that she needed time to think about it, but again she didn’t have the chance to do so when Neville once again interrupted her.

“The only choice you do have is between which classes to teach, you’re not allowed to refuse me,” he said, grinning.

“I don’t really think teaching is something I want to do...” she replied hesitantly.

“Hermione, you owe me for the time you froze me in our first year.” Hermione knew Neville wouldn’t give up before he got his will, and even if she didn’t like the idea of becoming a teacher she agreed. At least it was a position she’d gotten because of her brains, not her fame.

That evening was the first time in days that Ron bothered to talk with her. “I hear you’re taking the position Neville offered you.” Neville must have told Luna, who had told Ginny, who probably told Harry, who then told Ron.

“Yes.” Hermione wondered if the only reason he had returned was because she had finally gotten a job.

“I presume you’ll be given a room there.” Hermione stared at Ron and wondered if he was thankful that she wouldn’t be heading back each night.

“I suppose.”

“I know you’ll do well. You’ve always been great at teaching. Harry’s and Ron’s grades improved dramatically. You even helped me. Without your help, I wouldn’t have the position I have today.” She decided not to let him know how annoyed she really was. She didn’t want to destroy the little progress they were making.

The days after that crept slowly by, especially since Ron was sill partly avoiding her. While Ron was gone, Hermione wondered which class she would be best suited to teach. Based on her experience, Defence against the Dark Arts and Charms were both good choices. In the end, she decided to teach DADA. The least she could do was spread her knowledge of the Dark Arts.


	3. Chapter 3

The day when Hermione was to leave for Hogwarts, she couldn’t help feeling a heavy burden being lifted off her shoulders. While she loved Ron, she was glad she wouldn’t have to see him for a while. Maybe that was what they needed in order to save their relationship.

She said goodbye, took her bags and disapparated, leaving Ron alone outside their apartment. 

When she reached the school she was met by Neville, who was patiently waiting for her to arrive so he could take her to her chambers. Besides the house elves and a few teachers, the school was empty and would be the rest of that week. All teachers had to start working a week before school actually started, so they could prepare for their classes. Her room was close to the Gryffindor tower, since she was to be the Gryffindor head of house as well as the DADA teacher. The door was hidden behind a large portrait of a former Gryffindor, a man that had changed the world with medicine.

Her room was decorated in the typical Gryffindor colours, gold and red as far as the eye could see. The living area had a large sofa that looked comfortable enough to sleep on, unlike the one she had at home. In front of the sofa was a large coffee table with dozens of books waiting for her. She looked around and noticed that there was only one portrait on her wall, and it was empty. 

Neville must have seen that Hermione was staring at the empty portrait and informed her of the owner of the portrait. “That frame belongs to Godric Gryffindor, he only appears if you call on him. Privacy, you know.” Hermione was thankful that Neville was so helpful, and that she wouldn’t have to worry about nosy portraits. 

They continued over to the bedroom, where she was met by more gold and red. While Hermione loved the Gryffindor colours, she wondered if she could perhaps change them. Even after she had finished school, she hadn’t been able to get away from those colours, not as long as Ron thought it treacherous to invest in anything other than gold and red. They also had a lot of orange things, because of his obsession with the Chudley Cannons.

Changing the colours was something she would have to take care of later, because Neville told her it was time to meet the other teachers. She knew most of the teachers personally, but since the end of war several had quit or retired. Hermione tried her best to be happy about her new job, but the memories of Ron haunted her and made it difficult for her to enjoy her life.

They walked over to the third floor and stopped in front of a portrait of a thin woman that, based on her dress, could be from the 17th century.

“September fourteenth,” Neville said loudly to the woman. “The password is always the date of the next Quidditch match. I think it’s because they want to make sure we don’t forget the dates.” The portrait door opened up and they entered the teacher lounge.

Hermione was met by familiar and a few new smiling faces. She tried her best to smile but knew the attempts were unsuccessful when Neville told her not to look so gloomy.

Slowly, she greeted the new teachers before she was greeted by her old professors. She noticed that two teachers were missing from the count. Neville assured her that she would meet them later. Hermione accepted his answer and turned towards one of the new teachers that asked her a question about the war. She had been just about to answer when the portrait door opened and a familiar face entered.

“Malfoy?” Hermione stared at the blonde and wondered what he was doing here of all places.

“Granger, I see you arrived safely. Welcome.” Hermione looked at Neville and wondered why he hadn’t told her Draco was a member of the faculty. Before she answered Draco, she noticed that Minerva wasn’t looking at either of them. Maybe she was embarrassed because she had tricked Hermione into accepting the teaching position.

“Thank you. I presume you’re a teacher here.” Who would have thought, Draco Malfoy, a teacher. She looked at Neville with a sneaky glare. He would definitely pay later.

“So, are you going to tell us about the war?” It was one of the new teachers who had asked. He had no idea what kind of background Hermione and Draco shared and didn’t catch the strange chemistry that was present between them. The new professor was probably aware that Gryffindors and Slytherins weren’t the closest of friends as it was his first year as a professor at Hogwarts, but as he had received his education at a school abroad, he had no inkling of the long stretched history of animosity between the two houses. 

Hermione couldn’t help looking at Draco as he sat down in an empty chair and waited just like the rest of them. Suddenly, she found it harder to speak. “I’m sorry, maybe I’ll tell you the story later when I’m not as tired as I am right now.” Hermione stood up, ignoring both Neville and Draco. “I think I should go and lie down for a while.” Several of the teachers agreed and said their goodbyes as she left the room.

At first she wanted to head back to her room, but as she stood in the hallway, she realized she needed fresh air more than rest.

Determined, she walked towards the school entrance to get some fresh air. Suddenly, she heard someone walking behind her, and out of curiosity she looked over her shoulder only to wish she had ignored it and kept on walking. Draco Malfoy walked down the stairs towards her.

“I heard you’re taking the DADA teaching position.” Hermione stared at him and wondered why he was even talking to her.

“Yes.” He smiled, which cause her to look down at her feet. When she realized she had no idea what position at the school he had, she looked up at him. Luckily for her, he wasn’t smiling this time. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think I know what your position is.”

“I’m the Potions professor.” Hermione thought it was strange since he’d never shown talent in that class, even if Snape had been the teacher. 

“Is there any reason for your choice of profession?” she asked, wondering what the cause for his decision was.

“No, is there any reason for your choice?”

“Neville forced me.” It was strange how easy it actually was to speak to him. Perhaps it was because it had been five years since the war, and everyone, including Draco, had grown up. Even Ran had matured since then, even if she didn’t think it was all that much.

“I never saw you as a person who would give in if forced,” he mused.

“I didn’t have anything better to do.” Hermione thought it was strange that Draco actually spoke to her like they didn’t share a past. “Well, I need to get some fresh air.” Hermione was about to leave when Draco joined her.

“I’ll come and keep you company.” If the conversation didn’t shock her, his suggestion sure did. Hermione stared at him and wondered what she could say in order to get him to leave her alone. It wasn’t because she was ungrateful for the changes she saw in him, but she needed to get some fresh air because of him, and having him there wouldn’t defeat the whole purpose.

“I appreciate it, but I would rather go alone.” Draco smiled, bowed, and left her without another word. Hermione stared at the man’s back and wondered what had gotten into him. If she wasn’t mistaken, she would say he wanted to become friends with her, not that she could understand why. Maybe he felt bad for what he had done during the war and was trying to make up for it? Whatever his reason was, it made her uncomfortable. 

Realizing that she hadn’t left the hall yet, she opened the large door and walked into the courtyard, hoping the fresh air might help clear away her messy thoughts. But while she sat there, she couldn’t get Malfoy out of her mind. He had changed, and by the looks of it, for the better. So why didn’t she like it? Maybe it was because he was giving her the attentiveness Ron had given up on as of late.

She had to push those thoughts away. Ron only needed some extra time to grow up. Soon he would be able to show her just how much he loved her. It had to be something else, she decided. The reason why she reacted the way she had could be because she hadn’t expected Draco to walk into the teacher’s lounge and she had fallen into shock. 

She knew she was right when she saw Draco later and didn’t feel the same tension as before, so it had to have been shock that had put her out. But to be on the safe side, she decided to ignore him, just in case she hadn’t gotten over the jolt.

Luckily, her schedule didn’t allow her much time to goof off; neither did her plans for the students once they returned to school. She wanted them to learn everything they needed to know, and she wanted each student to be able and ace their tests. Unfortunately, Neville did not allow her to stay locked up in her room the whole day. 

“You’ll go crazy as soon as the students arrive,” he said, ignoring her wish to sit alone and prepare for her classes. “Anyway, you have a visitor.” 

The first thing Hermione wanted to say was for Neville to tell the bastard to go away. While Hermione appreciated Draco’s attempt to change, she did not like that he was trying to make friends. Luckily, she didn’t say that because the guest was not Draco, but Ron. 

“Do you wish me to bring him here?” asked Neville. 

Hermione thought about it for a second, but decided it would be better if they sat somewhere else, just in case their reunion didn’t go well. She didn’t want to sit in her room and be reminded about their almost fight while trying to grade student’s essays.

“Hermione,” Ron said in a brighter tone than she thought he would have when he caught sight of her. “How are you?”

“Great. And you?” Ron reached out and hugged her since she was standing next to him.

“I’m great as well. Do you want to sit down somewhere?” Hermione smiled and nodded. Ron’s good mood was contagious and she felt her spirit lift. They walked over to a bench which they had used often when they were students. “Do you like being a teacher?” Ron asked, making Hermione smile.

“I don’t know since the student’s won’t come until Monday.”

“Oh yeah, should have known that based on the lack of students here.” Hermione suspected that he knew the student’s hadn’t come yet, but decided not to say anything.

“So, how are things at home?” 

“Great, though I think you’d discipline me for the lack of cleaning. But it’s so good to sit in the silence that I’m trying to relish the moment.” The words were out of his mouth before he’d had a chance to think about what he said. Even after he’d said it he didn’t really understand that he’d said something bad until he saw Hermione’s expression. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. It’s just that I think we need a small pause from each other.” 

It had only been three days since she left their apartment and Ron was already enjoying his freedom? While Hermione didn’t mind him enjoying his free time, she didn’t want him to think that their relationship needed a pause in order to work, even if she thought it might help them.

“Don’t worry, I know what you mean.” She knew he didn’t really mean it in a bad way, but his words had still stung.

“I’m sure you enjoy being apart from me as well.” 

Hermione wondered if he said that because he hoped he wasn’t the only one enjoying their time apart. If that was the reason behind it, then she knew that unless he changed, their relationship wouldn’t end well. She didn’t want to be with someone who enjoyed being apart, then making her admit that she enjoyed it as well just so he wouldn’t feel bad. She wanted someone who would love her, and show her every day just how much she was worth. Even Harry, who knew just as little about romance as Ron did, was able to show Ginny more love and emotions than Ron managed for her.

Hermione continued to look at Ron without saying a word, then after a few seconds, she nodded. That was enough for Ron as he continued to talk about who he and Harry had captured at work, and how they had done it. Hermione tried her best to act interested, but while Ron went on about his job, she wondered why he didn’t try harder to save their relationship and why he always had to run away when something happened between them.

Ron continued chatting with Hermione until Neville came out at which point the two boys started discussing Quidditch. Hermione couldn’t help feeling like a third wheel. As much as she wanted to leave, she was too tired to explain to Ron why she wanted to leave. She crossed her fingers that at least Neville would realise she was sitting there as well.

Someone must have heard her wish and sent her a saviour. If only it had been someone else anyone else.

“Why, hello Weasley,” Draco snarled. Hermione was surprised Draco still didn’t like Ron, especially since he was clearly kind to both her and Neville. But she couldn’t care any less about his attempt to make friends. She only wanted to be left alone.

“Malfoy, I thought Neville was kidding when he told me you worked as a teacher. What got you on this path? Didn’t you find enough people to bully around at the Ministry? Oh wait, you’re not allowed to work there. Guess all of your father’s money can’t help you there.”

“Ron!” Hermione shouted right before Draco found his wand. Neville stared at the two of them, and by the looks of it, he wasn’t going to stop them. Fearing what could happen if either one of them moved the argument to a new level, she stood between them with her arms stretched out. “Don’t you dare to do anything Malfoy and Ron, how could you?”

“Don’t worry, Hermione, if he does anything I’ll get him. Ministry employees have a higher rank than school teachers,” Ron said rudely.

“Is that all you care about?” She knew Ron enjoyed his rank, but she never thought he would use it for his own gain.

“How often has he used his power? Let me enjoy this before the brat decides to use his inheritance to buy his way into the Ministry like his father.” The expression on Ron’s face was cruel. She almost didn’t recognize him. 

“Ron!” Hermione was sure that Ron could see her anger because he closed his mouth and took a step back. She looked at Neville and Draco before she was able to decide what to do. Ron’s behaviour was not acceptable, no matter what Draco had done in the past. Brutally, she grabbed Ron’s arm and pulled him over to the gates. She looked back at the other two and noticed that they were talking. At least Draco didn’t blame Neville.

“How could you say something as mean as that Ron? I thought you were a better man.”

“He started it.” Anger shot through her at his lie. Was he really that stupid that he didn’t even see who really started it? Without thinking about it, she slapped him hard across his cheek, shocking him.

“He did not start it, you did. I have never thought you were able to say such things, especially about his father.” Everybody knew that Lucius was ill, and he probably didn’t have many years left. “I also don’t appreciate you enjoying me not being at home. I know you didn’t like our life and how we communicated, but if you hadn’t run away the first fifty times, things would have been different.”

“Hermione, I thought you said you enjoyed this time as well,” he said, confused. 

“You put those words in my mouth, Ron. Just so you know, I have been suffering each day while thinking about you, hoping that you would finally manage to grow up and talk to me for once, not run away.” She could see that she had shocked him, she even shocked herself, but there wasn’t much she could do about what had been said and done. “Now go back home and think about what you want in your future. I know now that you are enjoying your time alone so I shall try my best to do the same.”

“Hermione,” Ron started, only to be interrupted.

“Go home, and don’t come here until I allow you to visit me.” That should give her some free time from all the stupid words that came out of his mouth. She didn’t enjoy being hard on him, but sometimes that was the only way to speak to him.

When he was gone, she turned around and headed towards the school. Neville must have gotten bored at one point and left. If only Malfoy would do the same thing.

“He’s gone?” the man asked her.

“I sent him back.” She wanted to ignore him after that and run up to her room, but felt like he needed an apology. “Listen, I’m really sorry for what he said about your father, he had no right.”

“You shouldn’t apologize on his behalf, he’s the one that has to man up and apologize.” She stared at him and wondered when exactly he grew up.

“Okay. I guess I should head back to my chambers, lots of work before school starts.”

“I hope I’ll see you soon, and good luck with the preparations.” Hermione thought the last bit was strange but decided to ignore it. She had more important things to think about.

After Hermione’s ban, Ron did try to make her forgive him but she knew that if she gave in that soon he would never understand what he did wrong. She had made that mistake before. Knowing that he didn’t give up did eventually make her happy. At least he wasn’t enjoying his free time as much as before and that meant he thought about her more often too. It could easily sound like she was a mean girlfriend, but she only wanted him to understand that he couldn’t use his power without consequences. 

School started the first Monday after her fight with Ron, which took her mind off her relationship problems. While teaching wasn’t her favourite thing to do, she did enjoy being around the different students, except for some of the snottier students that thought they were above the rules. Most of them did belong in Slytherin, but Hermione chose not to believe they were like that because of their house. She believed more that they were placed there because of their behaviour.


	4. Chapter 4

As time passed, her anger with Ron slowly faded, and by the end of November he was finally allowed to visit her again. They had met once before, but briefly as Hermione hadn’t wanted him to think she had forgotten about his power abuse.

“I’m sorry about the things I said,” Ron apologized when they were sitting in her room alone. “I know now that I stepped across the line.”

“I’m glad to hear that you have realized what you did wrong. Apology accepted.” She could see that Ron’s mood instantly changed when she told him he was forgiven. But she soon realized that his smile wasn’t because he was happy for the forgiveness. He quickly moved closer to her before taking her hand in his own and kissing it. Then he kissed her neck and mouth.

“Hermione, do you know how much I love you?” Hermione smiled at that thought. Ron really did love her. “What do you say if we move ourselves into the bedroom?” Suddenly, the romantic atmosphere was gone. Hermione wanted to hit Ron for being so insensitive.

“No, I can’t do that here.”

“Why not? It’s been ages since the last time we did it and these are your private chambers.” All the romantic feelings she had about him were gone and replaced with annoyance.

“I could never have sex at school, even if this is my private chamber.”

“Come on, Hermione, even the students are doing it.” The annoyance was traded with disgust when he didn’t give up. It wasn’t the first time he had pushed her into sleeping with him. She knew she was sometimes a bit unfair, but she didn’t see why he needed to push her into something that was supposed to romantic. If he only spent some more time flirting instead of talking about his job, she would gladly have agreed to sleep with him.

“Only because students are doing something stupid it doesn’t mean I should be doing it as well, Ron,” she said coldly. 

“I’m only saying that you need to loosen up, or have you decided to be as uptight as McGonagall?” Hermione knew he spoke from experience and therefore did not know the fun loving side of Minerva, but that didn’t give him the right to insult their former teacher and Head of House, especially since she was kind to them. 

Well, except when they broke the rules.

“I said no.” She knew it would be stupid to part in anger again, so she thought of ways to make things good between them again. “Listen Ron, I’ll come home during the Christmas vacation. Can’t you wait another month?” She hated to make him wait, but she did not want to put her job on the line because he wanted to sleep with her at school.

“I suppose so.” To make things even worse between them, he let go of her hand and moved away from her, which meant he had only showed her the romantic side of him in order to get her into bed. Hermione was hurt and angry, but decided not to show him that, since it would only fuel the problems they were already facing.

An hour later, with no more handholding or kind words from Ron, he left. Hermione stood alone in her room and wondered why he didn’t seem interested in her after she refused him sex. She knew some men, and women, would be offended if they were refused, but she thought Ron cared about her more than his own needs.


	5. Chapter 5

Slowly, time passed and before she knew it Christmas vacation was only a week away. She had kept in touch with Ron after his visit but he didn’t seem to be too interested in chatting for long. And when they were chatting through the floo system, she noticed that he wasn’t even slightly interested in what she had to say. When he did talk, it was mostly about Quidditch or his job.

In the end, Hermione worried so much that she decided to ask Harry what might be wrong with him. Harry didn’t know much, except that Ron kept talking about how boring his life was. She knew their life wasn’t as exciting as it was back in school, but he had always told her that he was happy it had slowed down.

While correcting the latest tests and assignments, she thought about Ron, and how difficult it was living with him. She realized that he hadn’t been like himself since they had first moved in together. In the beginning, she would have pushed it out of her mind and smile since they did have a great relationship - when they weren’t annoyed at each other.

She was lost in her thoughts when, suddenly, there was a knock on her door. Surprised by the visit, she tried to tidy herself up before opening the door. What she was met with was a blonde, tall, and smiling teacher by the name of Draco Malfoy. Over the past few months, they had become friends, to Hermione’s shock, and they would spend some time together during each weekend, where they mostly talked or debated. 

What surprised her wasn’t that he was seeking her out, but that he was standing outside her room. Until that moment, they either met in the teachers’ lounge, the library, or outdoors, because they had wanted to keep it at least a little professionally between them. 

“I’ll be right out,” Hermione said when she realized it was time for their little chats. Perhaps talking to Draco would help her forget about her relationship problems.

“If you don’t mind, Hermione, I would love if we could sit in your living area today.” At first she wanted to say no, but decided that there was no good reason why they couldn’t sit in her room. Looking around the room before letting him enter, she realized it was a mess.

“I’m sorry for the parchment lying around.” She excused herself when he walked into her room.

“I know well enough how things look like during the test season.” Hermione smiled at his comment before closing the door. When she turned around she couldn’t help trying to pick up all the papers, only to drop several of them when her arms were filled. “I said don’t worry Hermione.” She smiled again while muttering something about too much work before deciding cleaning was a lost cause. Exhausted, she sat down, realizing only then how tired she really was.

Hermione closed her eyes for a second only to relax. Without knowing it she was slowly drifting off to dreamland where the stress of real life was forgotten.

She had no idea for how long she had slept, but when she woke up it was darker in the room, and she was leaning against Draco’s chest. Realizing then what had happen she quickly sat up, hoping she hadn’t drooled on his robes. After apologizing and rubbing her eyes she looked at Draco.

“Don’t be foolish, you were tired.” 

She was tired from thinking about all the tests she had to grade, the homework she had to go through, and the classes she had to teach. Ah yes, and worrying about Ron. Thinking about Ron mostly made her sad, because he didn’t like to have her leaning up against him. The few times she had leaned against him and fallen asleep, he had tried to slip away. She wasn’t used to sleeping on anyone, so when she woke up and realized Draco hadn’t even tried to push her off, she was certainly confused.

“You should have woken me up, or removed me from you.”

“Why?” 

There were many good reasons why she shouldn’t be sleeping on him, but most of the reasons could easily be taken the wrong way. And the last time she’d said she wanted to keep things professional, he’d gotten mad because he believed that they could hardly become friends if they couldn’t even spend a few hours together without having to think about being professional. 

“Because you shouldn’t have to sit here, doing nothing,” she lied.

“I really didn’t mind.” Without knowing exactly why, she started to blush. Embarrassed by her act, she turned away from him and stared at the homework pile that was left for her to grade, wanting to burn the thing instead. “Is something wrong?” Draco’s voice cut through her thoughts and brought her back to reality.

“No, nothing’s wrong,” she quickly answered in her defence.

“I have often observed that those that answer quickly have something to hide.”

“Then I’m sorry to say that your observations are wrong. There is really nothing wrong,” she insisted. 

“I know you well enough to know that teaching doesn’t tire you till you fall asleep during the day, so please, tell me what’s wrong.” Hermione hated it that Draco had become so nice and caring. If only Ron was like that, then she wouldn’t have think about him all day.

“There’s really -” She wasn’t able to finish before Draco interrupted her.

“Stop lying, Hermione, it doesn’t suit you. Tell me what’s bothering you,” he said. 

“Please, Draco, just leave it alone.” She was too tired to fight him.

“Is it Weasley?” She was surprised that he had guessed right, which caused her to pause up before answering.

“No, it’s not him.”

“You’re lying,” he observed. 

“Why? I didn’t answer too quickly.”

“Because it took you a while before you answered.”

“So if I’m answering quickly or slowly, I’m lying?” Her energy came back as her annoyance grew, and before she knew it her voice became louder. To her irritation, his voice was still perfectly even, which fuelled her anger even more. 

“I know well enough when someone is lying. Slytherin’s are good at telling.”

"I guess that comes from years of telling lies as well,” she said a little meanly. 

“Why are you so determined to start a fight?” he asked calmly. 

“I’m not starting anything. You’re the one that wouldn’t leave it alone!”

“So I’m the bad guy because I want you to be well?” 

She realized how stupid was acting. “I’m sorry.” Maybe it was just as well to confess, he didn’t seem to want to cause her more pain. “It is him, but I don’t want to talk about it.”

“If you ever want to talk, then you know where to find me.” Hermione was surprised at the way he allowed her to keep her problem to herself, and also by the way he handled her when she refused to listen to him. If only Ron had the ability to talk to her like that.

After that, they changed the topic and talked about normal things before Draco left two hours later. When Hermione was alone, she continued grading the homework, now less stressed out than before.


	6. Chapter 6

The next day was spent mostly in her room grading the last remaining papers before she left for a short visit at Hogsmeade. She arranged a meeting with Ron in order for them to talk about their problems. But that wasn’t her only plan. She had taken the day off from work in order to go over to their apartment to show Rom just how much she still loved him. While standing in front of the mirror, she put on some makeup and perfume, dressed in some of the nicest clothes she had before she left her room.

Right before she walked outside, she was stopped by Draco, who based on his clothes had detention with a few students. “You look amazing,” he said, making her blush. “Going somewhere special?”

“I’m just meeting Ron.” If she had been attentive enough, she would have realized that Draco’s smile had turned fake, and that he wanted to say something, but she didn’t pay much attention to him when she realized she would be late.

“I’m sure he will be glad to see you again.”

 

“I hope so too, since I don’t dress this nicely every day. I better run since I don’t want to be late,” she said in a rush. 

“No, you don’t want that.” Draco stood alone in the hall, staring at Hermione’s retreating back, fighting the urge to stop her from meeting the Weasley scum. He knew perfectly well what she planned, especially since only a few witches dressed up only to meet someone for a few hours. And she had taken off the whole day. Knowing there was nothing he could do, he left the empty hall to meet the students that had been so unfortunate to get into trouble with him.

Hermione ran towards the café she and Ron had agreed to meet at, hoping he hadn’t waited for too long. Quickly, she entered and shook off the snow that was stuck to her robe. Gradually, she took a step forward and looked around the room until she spotted the red haired man. Smilingly, she walked over to him and kissed his warm cheek. He must have been waiting for her.

“I’m sorry I was late, was detained just as I was about to leave.”

“That’s alright,” Ron smiled before taking her hand in his. “I ordered some hot coco, thought you might want it after your walk.”

“That is so thoughtful of you, thank you.” Hermione continued to smile at him, hoping that he noticed her hair, makeup, or her clothes, but he never said a word.

“So how are things at school? Dying to get your job back at the Ministry?” he asked, putting in the effort to make small talk. 

“Test season is stressful, but otherwise, it’s great. Not sure for how long I’ll stay there, but I still have another few months to decide if I want to continue as a teacher.” She could see that he wanted to say something but decided instead to stay quiet.

“How are the students and teachers treating you?” Something told Hermione that Ron wasn’t interested in knowing about the students or the teachers, only about one special man. Last time he’d asked, Hermione told him she didn’t appreciate him being rude about Draco as he was her co-worker.

“There are a few students that are difficult, but you know just as much as me that not everyone is perfect at every class.”

“Hey, I did pass,” he said jokingly. Hermione wanted to add to the joke but knew he wouldn’t appreciate her saying anything about how much help he had. If it wasn’t for her help, he wouldn’t have his job at the ministry since he had failed the test the first two times.

“I know you did, and I’m proud of you,” she added instead. 

“So what about your co-workers?” he persisted. 

“They are great, all are professional, no Lockhart or Umbridge this year,” she responded lightly, hoping it would be enough to satisfy him. 

“I’m glad to hear that.” She could see that he wasn’t too pleased about her answer.

They continued to chat for another thirty minutes before Hermione excused herself. She had been drinking way to much coco and had to freshen up as well, hoping Ron understood, but he was as ignorant as ever of her attempt to make herself pretty for him as he had been when she’d first walked in. 

“When I get back I have something to tell you.” She was planning to tell him that she wanted to go home and sleep with him, since he had behaved and apparently had grown up. 

She entered the toilet and did her business before she washed her hands. As she stared at herself in the mirror, she realized there was no possible way Ron couldn’t see how much makeup she was wearing. She practically looked like Ginny when she dressed up in order to flirt with Harry, not that she had to do that in order for him to give her a compliment. Sometimes she wished that Ron was more like Harry, attentive and romantic.

She snapped her purse to a close before heading out of the bathroom to see Ron, but then she had to stop because of what she saw. Ron was talking to a barmaid that was standing next to him. For the untrained eye it looked like they were only talking, but Hermione had been around hormonal teens for four months and knew well enough when someone was flirting. She could also thank her previous job for her ability to recognize human emotions. 

Instead of barging over there, she decided to play it a different way just in case it turned out that Ron would ignore her flirtation. Hermione watched as the girl smiled and pushed her breasts out to make herself look sexier, and how Ron softly touched her hand. Maybe Ron had a perfect explanation as to why he was flirting with the girl, maybe he didn’t even know that he was flirting with her. Ron could be quite blind at times.

Deciding that she should make her presence known she walked over to them, pretending that she didn’t see what was really going on.

“Oh, hello, are you a friend of Ron’s?” Both jumped when she spoke. Ron cleared his throat and looked back and forth between the two women in front of him. Hermione wanted to break down and cry right then. He had been flirting with the girl, and was now, unless Hermione was mistaken, trying to find an excuse to who the woman was.

“Hermione, this is Jasmine.” Hermione stared at the woman that had dark, straight hair, dark, brown eyes, and a smile that could melt ice. If Hermione hadn’t seen what she’d just saw, she would have thought the girl was really pretty, but knowing that she was flirting with Ron made her look like a whore. While she shook hands with the other girl, she repeatedly told herself to calm down and pretend like she didn’t know. Luckily for her the woman excused herself soon after that and Hermione and Ron were left alone.

“She seems nice,” Hermione said when they were alone again. She didn’t want to seem ignorant, but she definitely didn’t want to start another fight.

“She’s the sister of a co-worker.” Hermione didn’t believe him for a second, but because she chose to ignore their flirt in the beginning, it would be stupid to say anything now. “You said you had something to tell me.” Hermione was still lost in her thoughts and barely comprehended what Ron said.

“Oh, I’ve forgotten.” She wanted to leave as soon as possible because whenever she laid eyes on him, she wanted to slap him across his face. “I had better head back. I’m in charge of detention today.”

“They never stop do they?” Again Hermione wasn’t following Ron and barely saved herself from looking like a completely fool.

“Yeah, kids will be kids.” Luckily for her, they split up soon after that, allowing her to head back to school alone without worrying about him realizing she was hurt. Not that she was sure he would have noticed, anyways.

While she tried her best to ignore the pain until she reached the safety of her chamber, she couldn’t help the tears from flooding down her face. As quickly as possible, she walked up to her room and closed the door before throwing herself on her bed to cry.

What she hadn’t noticed on her way up to her room was that Draco had seen her, and knew because of her quick return that something wasn’t quite right. He quickly instructed the students that were in detention to meet up the next day after class since he had something important to attend to. While they didn’t love the idea of an extra day of detention, they knew better than to protest. Draco was firm and not to be messed with. 

Draco soon left the students and headed up to Hermione’s room where he stood outside and knocked on her door. After a minute of waiting, he decided it was enough and used the emergency password they were given in case something was wrong.

The door opened and he entered into an empty room. For a second he thought she might have gone somewhere else, but then he heard crying noises coming from the bedroom. 

“Hermione, what’s wrong?”

When Hermione realized she wasn’t alone she quickly sat up and tried to wipe away the tears, but didn’t realize that doing that only smeared her makeup all over her face, making her look like a mess. “Draco,” she said surprised. “What are you doing here?”

“I saw that you were in distress, and wanted to comfort you,” he said slowly. 

“What can you do to help me when you have no idea what my problem is?” she barked out, regretting it at once when she realized Draco didn’t mean anything bad.

“I may not know, but I can guess, and I guess that you’re suffering because of Weasley.” Hermione stared at him and worried that since he was able to see her suffering, everybody knew of it as well. It was a silly thought, she knew that, but she couldn’t help but worry. “I guess he did something wrong, not unlike him.”

“That’s not fair.” Hermione then remembered how little attention she received from Ron and cried even more.

“Hermione, please tell me what’s wrong.” Draco’s attention made things worse for Hermione, and she couldn’t stay strong anymore. She hid her face in her pillow. Suddenly, she felt herself being lifted and held against something hard, only to realize it was Draco himself. Normally, she would object, but in her distress she wasn’t able to do much. The longer she cried, the more care she received, and the harder it was for her to pull away. Maybe it was Ron’s fault. He gave her so little attention that she welcomed the attention from someone else.

She felt one of his hands caress her back while the other stroked her hair. She felt his arms pull her towards him and his breath against her forehead. She felt him lifting her head up until they faced each other before he leaned in and carefully kissed her.

Her breath was caught in her throat as their lips softly brushed against each other before Draco pressed his lips against hers again, sending a warm and fuzzy feeling through her body, making her stomach turn, and her brain turn into mush. When the kiss was over, her eyes were still closed. 

She didn’t dare open them. 

“Are you okay?” Draco asked, making the hair on her back stand up. She wanted to open her eyes, but she feared what was in front of her. “Hermione.” Her name was the thing that brought her back to reality, the one thing that made her realize that Draco had in fact kissed her.

“You...” she started only to be unsure of what to say next.

“I only did something I have wanted to do for weeks. For a while now, I’ve wanted to hold you close, kiss you, and tell you just how much you mean to me. You can’t say that you haven’t noticed a great deal of change in my behaviour. I never believed that love is something that comes easy, but with you, I can’t help my feelings.” Hermione’s face was burning, his words were making it hard for her to breathe, and she thought her heart might stop beating. “You have been on my mind for weeks, now, and I would be lying if I said I haven’t thought about us on a bed.” Without warning her he kissed her again.

Normally, people who didn’t want something would stop the situation from occurring a second time, but since Hermione had no idea if she wanted it or not, she let him kiss her. Her admission only led to a more passionate kiss that melted away the last piece of reasoning she had. Unexpectedly, she forgot about all her problems with Ron and kissed Draco back.

The longer the kiss lasted, the more passionate things turned, and soon Hermione was laying down on the bed with Draco hovering above her, kissing and caressing her. To her surprise, she found herself moaning when he grabbed one of her breasts and kneaded it, and she continued to moan as his hand travelled down her body until it reached the edge of her skirt. She found it extremely difficult to come up with any reasons of why she should stop him from continuing, and in the end decided that it didn’t matter either way since she wasn’t receiving any attention from Ron.

Draco’s fingers traced her thighs until they reached the most delicate spot between her legs and carefully he massaged her until she dug her nails in his back so as not to cry out in pleasure. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt that kind of pleasure brought by someone else. While that hand was caressing her lower part, the other hand found its way beneath her blouse and travelled up to her breast. The fingers against her naked skin sent shivers down her body, and when he tugged at her nipple Hermione arched her back, wanting to give him even more of her body. Never in her life had Hermione been as excited as right then. The saddest part was that she had never felt like this with Ron.

Ron, something deep down inside of her told her she had to think about him, but the few times he did cross her mind, she was reminded about the way he flirted with the barmaid. She wasn’t sure, but knew that if he could flirt with her right then nothing would stop him from flirting with other girls, maybe he even slept with others. The few thoughts she had of him were soon forgotten when Draco’s tongue roamed her neck. 

Hermione was about to moan again when she suddenly found herself gasping. Suddenly one of Draco’s fingers entered her, making her shiver until she barely could control herself. Draco continued taunting her for another few minutes before he completely released her. Hermione was drawn between complaining about him stopping and breaking away from him.

She didn’t have time to think further when Draco commanded her to sit up. For a second she wondered why he wanted her up. She soon discovered why when she obeyed him. He wanted to remove her top. Once it was off, she couldn’t help worrying about her body. While she knew she didn’t look all that bad, she was far from perfect. 

When he undid her bra, she tried to hide her breasts, only to be stopped by him. “Don’t do that, you’re so beautiful.” While she appreciated his praise, she did not think it was smart to continue, but she wasn’t able to stop him or herself at that point. Again, he bent down and kissed her, and all the thoughts of trying to escape him melted away.

Slowly, the rest of her clothes disappeared, as well as his, and in the end they were lying naked in the bed, side by side. Hermione couldn’t help enjoying Draco’s soft and naked body, he was treating his body much better than Ron, who thought lotions and skin care products were only for women.

When Draco was finally done caressing every inch of her body, he spread her legs and positioned himself between them. Hermione held her breath as she stared at him, knowing well enough what would happen if she didn’t stop. She closed her eyes for a second and thought really hard about what she really wanted, and realized she did want Draco right then. When she opened her eyes again, Draco was smiling before he slowly pushed against her. If Hermione regretted her decision it was too late to save herself, especially since he had fully entered her.

“You’re the most amazing person I know of,” he said when he stopped to look at her. 

Hermione wasn’t sure what to do or say, so she continued to stare at him. She wanted to tell him to shut up. Cheating was one thing, but enjoying everything and not wanting him to stop was much worse. His fingers crawled over her naked torso before he started to move, making her gasp and moan until she had to close her eyes because she was too embarrassed by the noises she couldn’t hold back. Faster and harder he pushed himself in her, moaning almost just as much as she did. 

Hermione was in such a state that she barely realized Draco was saying anything, especially since he was whispering it. “I’m coming,” he whispered against her neck. Two seconds later he moaned out loudly and didn’t stop until he was done. Hermione watched him as he tried to catch his breath, then he let himself fall down next to Hermione with his hand on her belly.

“I’m so sorry that you didn’t come,” he whispered in her ear. 

Hermione closed her eyes when she realized Draco was thinking about her. It would be much better if he just ignored her. His hand slowly caressed her belly before he pulled her closer to him. Hermione couldn’t help the shock that passed through her. Ron wasn’t the type that liked to cuddle so she hadn’t experienced it that much. She quickly realized that it was quite good to lie in the arms of someone after sex, even if that someone was the wrong someone. 

“I promise that next time I’ll concentrate only on your pleasure.” Two things went through Hermione’s mind right then, the first was that Draco believed there would be a next time, and the second was that Draco cared more about her than Ron did.

“There won’t be a next time,” she said firmly. When she turned towards him she could see that he was hurt, but that he held his mouth shut.

“Are you sure?” he asked after a few seconds in silence. Hermione couldn’t help turn her gaze upon him, and then she noticed how hurt he was, but there was no reason why he should be hurt.

“Yes. Quite sure.”There was another silence before Draco finally moved away from her to get dressed. Hermione closed her eyes and covered her body. She did not want him to see her in such a state, even if he had already seen everything there was to see. 

“If that is really what you wish, then I cannot argue with you.” Hermione still didn’t understand why he sounded so hurt. He was Draco Malfoy, a proud man. “I want you to know that I will never forget this.” Hermione chose not to answer him. After what they had done, it would be best to have as little contact as possible; and that sadly meant no more debates during the weekends.

She chose not to move until the door closed behind him. When she was sure she was alone, she allowed the tears to fall from her eyes. The tears weren’t because of what she had done, it was because she enjoyed Draco more than Ron.

When she stopped crying she scrambled herself up from the bed and headed over to the bathroom where she took a long hot shower. Desperately, she tried to ignore the hot images of Draco that haunted her whenever she closed her eyes. Maybe after a long sleep she would forget about Draco and things would go back to normal.

She wanted to go to bed right then but knew she wouldn’t sleep for long, especially not since it was only six pm. She tried to sit and read a book, but after ten minutes she gave up and found her secret stash of sleeping draught and drank it all before lying down on the bed and closing her eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning Hermione realized that the sleep hadn’t really helped. While she hadn’t dreamed of Draco, she was still haunted by images of the previous night. She knew of course that it could never happen again, which meant she would have to ignore him until her own mind was settled again.

As soon as she entered the Great Hall she discovered that Draco was not giving up that easily. As she walked past him he greeted her politely, which she ignored. She firmly sat down in her seat and quickly ate her breakfast. Once she was done, she stood up and swiftly left the great hall, ignoring the puzzled looks she got from her co-workers.

Except for during classes, she was barely seen as she was hiding in her room. She knew it was stupid of her to hide from the world only because she didn’t want to see one man, but whenever she saw the blond haired man, her heart almost stopped and her breath got caught in her throat. Hermione discovered that she wanted to let him hold her tightly against his chest again and let him kiss her neck. 

Those thoughts scared her. She wasn’t supposed to enjoy cheating, especially since she always thought those that cheated were monsters. Her thoughts went back to the meeting with Ron, and the way he had flirted with that barmaid. If he was sleeping with her it meant he was just as much to blame as Hermione, but she had no proof of him cheating besides the flirting. Maybe he had never cheated on Hermione, maybe she had misread the behaviour between Ron and the girl and they had never flirted. So many maybes went through Hermione’s mind that she had to lie down and close her eyes.

When she heard someone knocking on the door she realized that she had almost fallen asleep. Worrying had always exhausted her. She chose to ignore it. If she wasn’t mistaken, Draco was the one standing on the other side of the door.

Like she feared, it was Draco who stood on the other side of the door. He started apologizing for everything he did that offended her and hoping she would allow him entrance soon so they could talk.

The next days passed in the same way, Hermione woke up and ignored Draco, avoided him throughout the day and locking herself in her room at night. It wasn’t until late Tuesday evening that everything changed.

Hermione heard a knock on her door, and after a quick spell she realized it was Neville. She knew her former classmate must have noticed that something strange was going on and that meant it was only a question of time before he would seek her out. Silently, he sat down next to her, waiting for her to start since they both knew why he was there.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to continue this position next year.” There was a second silence where Hermione imagined Neville wondering what the cause of her decision was. She hoped that he would allow her to leave her position without any questions, but knew well enough that he wouldn’t give up that easily at what he believed. 

He had changed after the war.

“Did anyone do anything to chase you away?”

“No.” If he was her friend he would leave it at that and leave himself.

Apparently, he wasn’t her friend continued digging. “Did Draco do anything?”

“No, why would you say that?”

“You have ignored him this entire week. Don’t you dare tell me you haven’t, it’s as clear as the day.” Hermione had to look away when she realized she couldn’t avoid Neville’s questions, if only he too was like Ron, ignoring the difficult questions and leaving her alone.

“He didn’t do anything.” She turned back to Neville, hoping he would believe her if she faced him.

“Then why have you been avoiding him?”

“I did something stupid, Neville.” She turned away again as she realized she was about to cry. Like the good friend Neville was, he moved close to her and pulled her into a hug. Hermione would have let him hold her if it didn’t brutally remind her about Draco and how things had started between them. She didn’t believe Neville would ever do something like that and she didn’t think she would allow anything to happen between them. She only didn’t want to be reminded.

“I know you don’t want me poking in your relationship with Ron, but I don’t believe you’re that happy with him,” he began.

“Why do you say that?” She and Ron tried to act like things were going well between them, so most people did not know about their problems.

“I visited Harry several times and we often start talking about you two. He confessed that he didn’t believe things were going as smoothly between you two as he thought it could be and that sometimes he thinks you both would be better off alone,” he informed her. 

She had no idea Harry thought that. Every time she had seen him, he seemed to be happy that they were still together. 

“I don’t mean to hurt you or anything, but I heard Ron say that he can’t end things since he thinks you’re delicate and would probably kill yourself if it were over between you two.” Neville might not have wanted to hurt her, but his words cut deep into her soul.

“So everybody thinks we don’t fit together, even Ron?” Neville seemed lost, which made Hermione feel sorry for him for a few seconds until she remembered that he had talked about her behind her back. “Everybody has an opinion about my relationship and refuses to tell me, how do you think that makes me feel?”

“Not everybody knows, only your closest friends.”

“Do you hear yourself? My closest friends think my relationship is crap and my boyfriend thinks it as well but believes I’ll kill myself if he breaks up with me. My whole life is turned upside down and you think I’m not going to be hurt about this information?”

“I’m sorry to be the one who tells you this, I wanted them to tell you before, but they told me not to,” he said sadly. 

“I can’t believe it. I thought they cared about me.” She thought she was going to cry.

“They do, that is why they didn’t want to tell you. They thought that you were happy in your relationship.” Hermione wondered who believed so. Ron knew well enough that she had just as many problems as he did. “Hermione, I’m only telling you this because I don’t want to see you waste your life with Ron if you can be happy with someone else.”

“And who might that supposed to be?”

“Draco.” When she heard his name she realized Neville must have seen something going on between them, not that she knew what that something might be.

“Draco? You can’t be serious.”

“He has told me how he feels about you Hermione.” How he feels? She had no idea he felt anything for her. That might not be entirely true. He wouldn’t have slept with her if he didn’t like her, but having feelings for her was completely new for her.

“Everybody has an opinion about my relationship, why has nobody told me this before?”

“I’m telling you this now.”

“And why hasn’t Draco told me what he feels about me? Why did he tell you and not me?” she asked him. 

“He knows you’re in a relationship and decided not to compromise it,” he responded slowly. 

“Did he know that nobody thought our relationship was good for anything?”

“He didn’t know how bad your relationship was and I didn’t tell him,” he said as if it was obvious. “He said he would rather be friends with you than risk it by telling you his true feelings and watch you run away.”

“Why does everybody choose not to tell me what they really think? Does everyone think I’m weak?” Hermione couldn’t take it anymore and stood up, but she had no idea where to go so she didn’t move.

“Nobody told you because Ron forbade us. I’m actually breaking my promise by telling you all this.” Hermione had to get away and walked over to the window where she stared at the soft snow that covered the school grounds. “I think Ron has it all wrong, you’re not weak; he is. He believes you’ll kill yourself if he breaks up with you, I think he will lose his mind if he loses you.”

“Thanks Neville, for telling me all this. Can you please leave now? I have a lot to think about.” She could hear him open his mouth to say something else, so she quickly cut him off. “I appreciate your help, but I have to be alone for my decision. And if you would be so kind, can you tell Draco not to try and contact me again?” It might be stupid to decide that right then and there, but after being deceived so badly she really needed some time off from everybody. Neville agreed and left. 

When the door closed behind him the tears flooded out of her eyes and she fell down, heartbroken.


	8. Chapter 8

It felt like the whole world was a lie, like everybody was fake, and she wasn’t worthy of the truth. Ron apparently didn’t love her and thought she was weak enough to kill herself. Harry was also weak because he hadn’t stood up to Ron; how could he let him hurt her like that? What kind of friend was he anyways? And Draco, whom she had found so much comfort in, cared for her more than her friends apparently did. 

Well, not all of her friends. Neville had broken the silence because he had thought it would help her, and Luna would have told her if she had heard Ron say anything about thinking their relationship was crap. That left Ginny, who must have seen or heard something. If she had known how things were between Hermione and her brother, why hadn’t she told Hermione anything?

The answer was quite clear. Ginny still looked forward to the day she could call Hermione her sister. But surely Ginny wasn’t going to risk her happiness simply to have be part of the family. Hermione couldn’t be sure since Ginny strongly took after Molly, believing that people could sacrifice themselves for the sake of the family. Ginny had once told Hermione that she had loved Harry since she was five years old and would change herself to be with him. Hermione did not exactly agree with her thoughts, but knew she would do everything in her power to make him happy, and Harry would do everything he could to make her happy. So in a twisted way, they were perfect for each other.

If only Ron was able to sacrifice something for her, to be as selfless as his best friend and sister clearly were. She could still remember their first month together, where he’d behaved like a child, expecting Hermione to do everything around the house because his mother had done everything. Hermione had grown up in a family where both her parents had worked together. There had never been “his and hers tasks”. She should have known that her life wouldn’t be as easy as her parents’ had been, but because she’d loved him so much, she ignored all the warning signs.

She knew what she had to do with Ron. Things could not continue like they were. She would also have to visit to Harry and Ginny and tell them what she thought of their agreement with Ron. The smartest thing would be to tell them before the Christmas celebration, which was the day after tomorrow.

That night Hermione thought she would have problems sleeping because of her difficult impending decision. So when she woke up and realized how well rested she felt, she was certainly amazed. She felt calmer than she had in a long time, which made her believe that her decision to end her relationship was for the best. It might be mean to do so right before the Christmas holiday, but how long had he been thinking that their relationship wasn’t going well? 

Two hours before she planned to leave Hogwarts, she sat on her sofa and stared into the fire. The flames calmed her. She was a little nervous, she supposed. She had never really broken up a relationship with anyone. She and Krum had never really been a couple, and they still kept in touch regularly. She had never liked Cormac, so breaking up with him had been pretty easy, it was getting away from him was harder. Besides, the first two had never meant anything to her. Her schoolwork had always been more important to her than boys.

Maybe that was the reason why Ron believed she was weak. Whatever his reasons were, they were completely wrong for each other. 

She knew that now.

Suddenly, she heard a knock on her door. Hermione waved her wand to see who it was and was surprised to see Draco standing there nervously, waiting for her to answer. Neville assured her that he had told Draco to stay away from her, so she was surprised at his visit. She decided to ignore him as he knew she was in her room. In the end he would take the hint and leave. Or so she thought.

What she didn’t know was that he was not going to respect her privacy. Using the emergency password, he entered the room. She thought she may have forgotten to close the door behind her the day she had returned from Hogsmeade, but now she knew what most likely had happened.

“That password is for emergency use only,” she admonished. 

“This is an emergency.” Hermione had to hold back a snarky comment when she realized her fury was getting out of hand. “You were planning to leave without allowing me to explain.”

“What I choose to do is none of your concern.”

“It is my concern when you’re planning to quit in the summer.” Hermione was angry. Neville had violated her trust and had told Draco something she hadn’t wanted him to know.

“So he told you, did he? What else did he tell you?” she asked. 

“Just that you’re planning to quit your job.” At least he wasn’t trying to manipulate them into doing as he wanted.

“So why are you here now? I won’t quit before summer.”

“I figured that it would be better if I told you this now, especially since I know you will be back after the holidays,” he said, pausing to catch her reaction. “If I’d told you in the summer, I might not have had another chance to talk with you.” Hermione hadn’t really thought of avoiding him for the rest of their life, so that he thought about it in that way surprised her a little bit. She admired his ability to think strategically. “I also brought you a Christmas present,” he said right before she was about to respond.

“I don’t want to hear what you have to say, and I don’t want your gift,” she said a little cruelly. She turned away so he wouldn’t see how much it had actually hurt her to say that. In reality, she wanted to tell him everything that bothered her, she wanted to cuddle next to him, and she wanted to kiss him.

“You don’t have a choice. Hermione, I’ve changed greatly after the war, you know this. I’m no longer the arrogant snob I used to be. I have learned to appreciate those that aren’t pureblood, and while it might seem like a small step for you, it’s a big one for me, especially because of my family background. When you came back I decided to try and make peace between us.” He almost seemed conflicted. “What I didn’t expect was that I would appreciate your company more than anyone else’s. What I mean to say that... I love you. I have secretly loved you for over a month, and admired you months before that! You’re intelligent, strong, stubborn, kind, and funny.” 

Why was he saying those things to her and not Ron? Why did Draco have to be the one she could imagine her future with?

“I don’t think you know what love is Draco.” The truth was that she didn’t even know the answers, she only thought she did. She cared deeply for Draco, she could see as much, but that didn’t mean she loved him.

“Don’t tell me what I think might be wrong. I know my feelings enough to know that the ones I have for you are love. I love you so much that I would rather stay friends with you the rest of my life than never being able to see you again.” His eyes were pained. 

“Then that is what we’ll do, stay friends.” Hermione could see he had a hard time holding his tongue. He might not have expected Hermione to take him up on his offer. Hermione was still turned away from him, which was good because she was sure her eyes were red from holding back the tears threatening to spill over.

“Then friends we are.” She heard him place something on the table before he left, wishing her a good holiday before closing the door behind him. When the door was closed, Hermione placed her face in her hands and released the tears that were hurting her soul.

Ten minutes later, when she got the tears under control, she finally turned around and faced the empty room. It looked the same as it always had, except for the gift wrapped in gold, red, and green placed on the table. For a second, she wanted to find her wand and incinerate the gift, but she didn’t have the heart to burn a book. She wasn’t completely sure it was a book, but based on the sound it had made when he had placed it on the table, and the size and shape; it most likely was a book.

Angry that she wasn’t able to dispose of the gift, she sat down on the sofa and stared at it, wondering what it might be. In her opinion, books were quite personal, and only supposed to be given by people who knew each other well. As much as it hurt to think about Ron, he had never given her a book that that she had liked, or on a topic she cared to know more of. Luna, as eccentric as she was, was one of the few who gave her books she found interesting. Neville and Harry had also sometimes been lucky at their selection. 

Eager to find out if he was the kind of the person who knew how to pick out books or not, she unwrapped the gift, secretly hoping he hadn’t picked out a book she would like. If he had no idea about her tastes, it would make their departure much easier. When she saw the title she was shocked. The story was one that she had read thousands of times before. It had been one of her favourite stories since she was a child. She admitted that it was stupid to love such a fairytale, but how could she not when she felt so similar to the main female character? Beauty and the Beast was considered one of the greatest fairy tale love stories of all time, and she couldn’t agree more.

She had been eleven years old when the animated Disney movie had been released and her parents had decided to take her to the cinema during that year’s Christmas vacation. Everything in the movie was magical: the story, the music, the girl who loved to read books, and in the end found love in a beast and monster. She had never really been impressed by such fictional love stories, especially not the animated kind, but when she’d seen Beauty and the Beast, she’d discovered just why. None of the other girls cared much about books, at least not in the animated movies. Since then she had read everything that was even remotely similar to her favourite love story.

While admiring the book, she realized that it was an original copy, written in French. While she didn’t know much French, she did know how to appreciate such a book. And her appreciation grew deeper when she opened it and realized it was the first edition. How Draco had managed to find the first edition of a book written by a muggle would be a mystery until she died. Unless, of course, she asked him.

She would have continued staring at the book if the alarm she had set didn’t go off and told her it was time to floo over to Ron. After she hid the book and placed several protection spells on it, she grabbed her bag and left by floo.


	9. Chapter 9

When she reached her apartment, she thought Ron would be waiting for her, but the apartment was empty and cold, which meant that Ron had been out a long time. She lit the lights and changed the temperature with a simple flick of her wrist. When she looked around the room, she wished she hadn’t done so because she had never seen her place as dirty as just then. Ron must have enjoyed being a bachelor, because the apartment looked like one of those bachelor apartments in the muggle movies Hermione had seen.

Feeling ill at how Ron had treated their apartment in her absence, she magically poured herself a glass of some of the liquor that Ron usually drank. The alcohol was strong, but she figured she needed it, especially since she was starting to become nervous at what she was about to do.

After several shots of the alcohol, a quick cleaning around the apartment, and a movie, Ron finally came home.

“Hermione, what are you doing here?” His shock annoyed Hermione to great lengths, especially since they had agreed she would come home the night before the Christmas dinner. Hastily, she stood up, only to realize it was a mistake when the floor wouldn’t stop moving.

“I came as agreed, at two am.” When Ron didn’t apologize for forgetting, she became even angrier. “Have you forgotten that I even exist? This place looked like the bottom of the trash bin, it was cold and dark, and you come back hours after you told me to come here at two!”

“Darling,” Ron smiled while walking closer to her.

“Don’t darling me,” Hermione snapped at him. She was about to open her mouth and tell him she wanted to end the relationship when Ron crossed the final space between them and grabbed her. The sudden change confused Hermione and whatever she had wanted to say was lost.

“Baby, don’t you think you’re over reacting?” 

When he called her baby, she remembered once again what she wanted to tell him and opened her mouth, only to be interrupted again by Ron kissing her. She could easily taste the sweets on his breath. Wherever he had been, he must have enjoyed himself. She placed one hand on his chest, trying to push him away, but the short space between them blocked her from doing much. The alcohol in her system wasn’t helping either. While she had the will to push him away, she lacked the power, and in the end she could barely hold her arm up.

She felt his arms around her, lifting her up, and carrying her somewhere. Her eyes were closed and she was confused at her surroundings. She didn’t realize it was the bedroom she was in before she was laid down on the soft bed. She continued to keep her eyes closed, fearing what she would see if she opened them. Secretly, she longed for the past where she and Ron would make love, before they fought every week.

“I have longed for your body for so long,” he moaned. 

Maybe Ron had no idea what it sounded like, but for Hermione it didn’t sound like that he had longed for her, only her body. Suddenly, she found it difficult to stay still beneath him, but as much as she tried to move, she wasn’t able to get away. Maybe it was because she had been drinking, or because he didn’t realize she was trying to move away. In the end she was tired and decided to let him have her. It wasn’t like she hated having him on top of her; she just hated having someone who didn’t seem to care about her as a person.

When he was about half way through she tried to think about something else, something that might take her mind off the fact that she, as a person, wasn’t wanted. While she kept her eyes closed, and felt Ron doing what he wanted to do, she was reminded about Draco and their passionate day together. She remembered how kind he had been, how he had taken care of her, even if when he thought about himself, he had taken care of her. 

Luckily for her, she didn’t have to lay there for long because Ron finished two minutes later. As always, he fell down next to her, but not close enough to touch her. Because he wasn’t on top of her any more, the warmth was gone and she started to freeze, and because she didn’t want to become sick, she covered her body with the blanket that lay next to her. When she was sure she wouldn’t freeze she turned around and faced Ron. She remembered Draco, the way he placed his arm around her and cuddled afterwards. As a small test she placed her hand over Ron, only to be told not to do it so close after he came.

She had allowed him to sleep with her, and because of that she would never forgive herself. But what was done was done. It had been her mistake that she hadn’t fought harder. What she was sure of was that she would end things, just as soon as her eyes weren’t closing and her mind wasn’t drifting away. The alcohol, anger, cleaning, and sex had made her extremely tired, and before she could end her relationship, she fell into a deep sleep that was haunted by Draco, Neville, and Ron.


	10. Chapter 10

She would have slept throughout the night if she hadn’t woken up because she lacked a duvet. At first she was confused as to what had happened, then she recognized Ron next to her, with the duvet tucked around himself. She tried to pull it from him carefully, but when it wouldn’t move an inch she gave up trying to do it silently. Poking him on his shoulder and whispering his name, she told him he had taken the whole duvet and she was freezing. The answer she received back was far from romantic or nice. He said that there was an extra in the cupboard that she could take for herself.

His lack of feelings for her and rudeness made her sick. She wanted to wake him up and tell him it was over between them. It was tempting but she had a better idea. Instead of finding the extra duvet and going back to sleep, she got dressed and found her wand. Placing a silencing charm on the closet, she magically called all her clothes. Then she did the same with all her books and her things. Most of her belongings she shrunk and carefully placed in her trunk. The only possessions that she had left behind were her furniture, and she would definitely come back for them later. She had also wanted to place a protection spell on them so that Ron wouldn’t be able to ruin any of them, in case he couldn’t control his anger, but decided to give him that much faith. 

If he did destroy them he would pay.

Then she sat down on the sofa and waited for Ron to wake up, reading her own copy of the Beauty and the Beast.

She woke up again at four and had to wait till eleven before Ron finally woke up. Disorientated, he exited the bedroom, said good morning to Hermione and walked straight into the bathroom. When he exited the bathroom, he had a puzzled look on his face, and as he walked deeper in the living room his facial expression became stranger.

“Where are all the things?” Hermione chose to take a small pause in case she said something she would regret. She didn’t feel sorry for Ron, since he didn’t really care for her. She knew what she had to do, but seeing him there like a lost little child, she did feel sorry for him. “Hermione?” he asked again.

“I can’t do this Ron. I have thought long and hard and I simply can’t do it any more.” She stood up and faced him. It would look pitiful if she continued to sit while he stood. “It has taken me a long time to realize that we haven’t been happy in quite some time.”

“What are you talking about? We’re happy.”

“No, Ron, we aren’t. We fight more than we talk, and often it ends up with you leaving for the night.” She had left herself of course, but most times she stayed behind, hoping Ron wouldn’t run. “Don’t try to convince me otherwise. I know you don’t really want to be in this relationship, either.”

“That’s a lie.” 

Hermione thought of telling him what Neville had told her, but she didn’t want her friend to suffer for helping her see the truth. If Ron discovered that he had broken his promise, he would be angry, and after the war he had learned to show his emotions in a more physical way.

“I know you’re flirting with others, and I know you don’t care for me that much,” she said calmly.

“Hermione, if you think that is the truth, then you’re lying to yourself. Of course I care for you, and I haven’t flirted with anyone,” he defended himself.

“I’m not lying to myself, I saw you the last time we met. I saw you flirting with that barmaid.” Her voice was still calm and she was surprisingly collected. 

“Baby, we weren’t flirting.” Hermione knew he had changed since he had never taken up the habit of calling her baby. “And you can’t break up with me on the day of our Christmas dinner.”

“I planned to do it yesterday, but I forgot.”

“Forgot? You mean before or after you had sex with me?” She knew that if she continued to answer his questions, she would never be able to leave, so she ignored him.

“I don’t want this any more. It’s over.” She picked up her suitcase and walked over to the door. Right before she exited the apartment she stopped and turned around. “I’ll be back for my furniture once I have my own place.” She disapparated at once when she reached the street. She did not want to take a last look at the apartment that they have lived in the last five years or so.

When she was back at Hogwarts, she speedily headed over to her room where she locked herself in. Luckily, she hadn’t met anyone on her way up to her room, and that meant that nobody would bother her since they believed she was away for the holidays.

She might have gotten away with sneaking back if it wasn’t for the house elves. They had received orders that nobody was allowed to eat in their rooms during the Christmas vacation. Minerva wanted the few people that were there to sit in the same room while dining. So when the house elf’s received an order from Hermione, they instantly told the headmistress. 

Minerva wanted to tell them to refuse Hermione, but knew the girl had planned to stay with the Weasley’s, so something must have happened in order to make her come back without notifying anybody. “Take her orders, but nobody else’s.” Minerva turned towards Neville, who she knew was close to Hermione, and told him about the news. He as well was surprised, but knew well enough what might have caused her sudden return.

Neville wanted to tell Draco what had happened, because the two of them deserved each other, but knew well enough that Hermione wouldn’t appreciate him interfering like that. He only hoped that they talked to each other before it was too late. He only hoped things would work out because if they didn’t, he feared he would have to interfere with their relationship.

While Minerva wondered what had happened and Neville wondered how to get Hermione and Draco together, the blond man sat in his room, drinking while staring at the flames that were slowly flickering in the grate. He could not get the image of Hermione with the red haired baboon out of his mind. He did not deserve her, not when he made her cry. He hadn’t meant to use her distress like he did, but when he had started, he couldn’t stop himself. Maybe if he had controlled himself better, she wouldn’t have thrown him out like that. Sadly, he would never know because he had managed to chase her away.

Draco left his drink on the table and walked into the bedroom. She was out celebrating with the bloody Weasleys, so he didn’t bother staying awake. If he was lucky, he would be able to sleep through the holiday.

Hermione imagined Draco out in a fancy restaurant with a blonde, younger girl, laughing, kissing, and having sex. Why she even thought he cared about her was beyond her. Neville had told her that he did, and he had said it as well, but she still didn’t believe it. She had been lied to far too many times to really believe anyone now.

Christmas holidays passed and nobody, except Minerva and Neville, knew Hermione was hiding in her room. The students came back with big smiles on their faces, ready to show off the wonderful things they’d received. Hermione smiled and acted like nothing was bothering her, and not much was, except Draco. She had accepted her situation, her decision, and was now thinking of moving as far away as she could as soon as school was over. She needed change.

Once school started up again, Hermione found Draco was behaving strangely. Their weekly meetings had also come to a stop. While she didn’t want to lose their friendship, she realized it was for the best. They could probably try and go back to normal, to save their friendship at least, but it was a selfish thought.

The best thing for them to do right then was to ignore each other and try and live their lives as normally as possible.


	11. Chapter 11

Hermione thought she could finally start a new year the way she wanted to, that maybe 2004 was her year. She lived her life almost like she had wanted to for one and a half months before her life changed completely, again.

Nervous, she sat in the cold chair, playing with her fingers in order to make the time pass faster. For the tenth time that minute, she looked at the clock and wondered if it was broken. She was about to look down at her lap again when the door opened and a woman in a white lab coat walked into the room. She had with her a piece of paper that she placed in front of her once she sat down in her chair.

“Miss Granger, the test shows that you are pregnant.” Hermione wasn’t sure how to react. Those were the words she had hoped to hear one day, but she thought she would have been married and holding her husband’s hands when the doctor announced she was pregnant. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to cry or laugh.

“That is splendid news,” she lied.

“Miss Granger, I don’t mean to sound harsh, but are you happy? Is this really what you want?” She must have seen it, somehow.

“Yes,” she lied again.

“There is nothing wrong with an abortion, if you really don’t want this future.”

“I know.” Hermione wiped away tears she hadn’t known escaped her tired eyes. The doctor covered Hermione’s hands with her own.

“Do you wish to tell me what’s bothering you?” Hermione knew that as a doctor, she was not required to ask Hermione that. Most would probably offer a psychologist.

“I never thought I would hear this news without a ring on my finger,” Hermione relented.

“Are you with someone?”the woman asked kindly.

“I broke up with him a month ago,” she replied sadly.

“You won’t be the only single mother in this age, and there are enough support groups that can help you out. You do, of course, need to tell him.” The tears threatened to fall harder and Hermione’s vision was blurred. She didn’t want to tell the woman this, but knew that whatever she said was confidential.

“I’m not even sure it’s his.” As far as she could see, there was no judgement in her eyes, just pity. “I know what it sounds like, but we haven’t slept together for eight months. When we met last time, I wanted to tell him it was over, but I drank too much and wasn’t able to stop him when he pushed himself on me.”

“You mean he raped you?” The doctor sounded shocked, but still she remained calm.

“No, if I really didn’t want it, I could have stopped him. I had just hoped he might have changed. It’s over now, unless this child is his.” A pang of emotion made its way through her chest at admitting it out loud. 

“So I take it you’re planning to keep it?” Hermione wasn’t sure what she would do, she really needed to think about it before deciding anything.

“I need to think about it,” she repeated loudly. Hermione stood up and thanked her doctor before she left the muggle hospital. She knew she would get anonymity in St. Mungo’s, but she didn’t want to take the chance of walking into someone familiar.

Once she was back at school, she sat down in her room with a blanket tucked around her shoulders. She put on some relaxing classical music she used to listen to whenever she was having a really difficult time deciding something important, and thought about her options.

She knew the easiest way would be to take an abortion, but was that the best choice? She didn’t judge anyone, but abortions did seem like the easy way out of a problem. Sometimes an abortion was for the best, like if someone was raped, or if the pregnancy might end in death. A mistake should not be removed as easily like that, especially not when she was the one who had behaved badly.

If she took the abortion, the problem would be gone and she wouldn’t have to face Ron or Draco and tell one of them that it’s his child. If she kept it, she knew Ron would want to be a part of the child’s life if it was his, and he would most likely try and force her into taking him back. She knew that Molly won’t like the idea of a Weasley born outside of wedlock. 

If it turned out that the baby belonged to Draco, then she really didn’t know what to do. She didn’t know how he would react and what he would do. Maybe he would want to stay in touch with the child, or maybe he would try and force her into aborting the child. She had no idea how either of them would react. 

She ended up sleeping on the sofa that night without having decided. Luckily for her it was Saturday, and she hadn’t signed up for the detention duty that night. That meant she would have all day to try and make up her decision.

That weekend passed and she still hadn’t made up her mind. She knew she still had time, since she wasn’t even two months pregnant. But such decisions needed time. She only hoped she wouldn’t regret her decision once it was made.

“Are you alright, Hermione?” It was Neville who asked. Like always, he worried about her.

“Just fine.” She smiled at him, hoping he believed her. Neville leaned closer to Hermione and whispered, since they were sitting in the main hall. Most of the students, and teachers were gone, but that didn’t mean they shouldn’t take precautions. 

“Do you want to talk about Ron, or Draco?” Neville had tried to make her talk since the end of the Christmas holiday. Sometimes, she thought he knew something but quickly brushed the thought away.

“I’m alright Neville, and I don’t need to talk,” she firmly responded.

“You do need to talk. Either with me, Minerva, Luna, Harry, Ginny, or Draco,” he insisted.

“Draco,” she almost shouted. “If I need to talk with someone, then it sure won’t be him.”

“Then pick one of the others, because you do need to talk with someone.” She knew he was right, but she didn’t want to talk with anyone before after she had made up her mind about the pregnancy.

She had passed the fourth month of the pregnancy before she finally decided what to do. She would keep the child.

It was a difficult decision, but in the end she didn’t think she could live with herself if she went through with the abortion. Sure, she had no relationship, no place to live, and no job. But she had a plan. Most people would say she was a fool, but she saw it as a challenge. After her position as a teacher ended, she would apply to become a wand maker apprentice, and then study while taking care of the child. If she ever needed help, she would ask her parents, who would gladly help her out. 

The only thing she did not have control over was who the child belonged to, and she wouldn’t be able to know until the birth. Strangely enough, there was no magical test she could take before the birth of the child, which meant she had to wait.


	12. Chapter 12

Being pregnant was not as bad as she had thought it would be. She knew everyone had different experiences, though, and was happy she wasn’t suffering like she knew many did. The doctor said everything was going great, the baby was healthy and so was she. Hermione was still seeing the muggle doctor and would do so until she thought it was right to tell everyone about her pregnancy. She tried not to think too much about how others would react because she feared everyone would be shocked and maybe even judge her.

She was able to keep it a secret for another month before the cat was out of the bag. It was early May when one of the students commented about her shape, then joking about her being pregnant. Hermione’s clothes weren’t revealing by any standards, so she wasn’t sure how the student was able to see a thing. She knew she could easily talk herself out of it, and buy some new robes that would hide more of her ever growing belly; but her secret had been a secret for far too long. 

She took a deep breath, turned towards the student that had joked about her shape, and confirmed it. The student, who was the class clown and bully, closed his mouth and looked shocked. Hermione knew she had won, so she smiled and continued with her class like nothing had happened.

The news travelled fast throughout the school, and by the end of the school day it seemed like everybody knew. Minerva was the first from the faculty whom congratulated her. Hermione could see that the older woman wanted to ask something, but didn’t. She was pretty sure she knew what the question was. Then she was congratulated by the Charms and History professors. The forth was Neville. She knew the man had something to say once he found out she was pregnant.

“You have to tell him.” She knew he would say something like that, and had prepared herself to answer.

“I can’t tell him because I don’t even know if it’s his,” she slowly explained. 

“How?” he asked. 

“When I went home for the Christmas holiday, I accidentally slept with Ron. I planned to break up with him that evening, but he wasn’t home and I started drinking. Instead of fighting him I allowed him to sleep with me.” A strange expression flitted across his face and that worried her. “Don’t you dare to judge me, Neville. I have beaten myself over both those mistakes since they first happened.”

“I wasn’t judging you, but Ron. I never thought he would turn into such a power hungry wizard. Ever since he started working at the Ministry, he’s just changed, and for the worse. I’m really happy it ended between you, but I do feel sorry for you if it turns out it’s his.” His expression was sympathetic. 

“I don’t know if Draco is much better, maybe he wishes me to remove the child.” She hated that things were so difficult, that everybody had an opinion. She knew she was on overdrive, that her hormones were probably messing with her. They had to be having some kind of effect, because she had the impossible urge to cry. 

“If that is what you believe then you’ve misjudged him. I should know, because I’ve been friends with him for the last two years. You better seek him out before he finds out the news and finds you. He does not appreciate secrets held from him.”

“How can I face him and say that I’m not sure the child is his?” she asked incredulously. “Anyway, it doesn’t really matter whose it is since I’m planning to do this on my own.” Luckily for her, Neville didn’t say anything more about telling Draco, instead he asked after her health.

She knew well enough she needed to tell both Ron and Draco about what was going on, and maybe it was stupid of her to think that she could avoid it, but she needed some time by herself first. She also knew that in order to get that time alone, she needed to lock herself in her room as quickly as possible.

She was glad she had changed the emergency password, because ten minutes after she locked herself in her room, Draco tried to gain entrance. First he knocked, and then he begged Hermione to let him in before he tried the emergency password, which did not work.

“I thought you were someone who wouldn’t keep such a thing a secret! I thought you were a noble woman.” Hermione wanted to remove the wards just so she could slap Draco. She was a good girl. She had only made a mistake, twice. She shouldn’t have slept with either of them.

Sadly, it was too late and she couldn’t reverse the time, and she had already made up her mind about the baby, so the only thing she could do now was untangle the worst knots. “Please let me in.” Hermione felt awful for the way she was treating Draco, but knew she couldn’t let him in when she felt so drained of energy.

Draco eventually left, leaving a heart broken woman crying on the sofa. She knew she would slap him the next time she saw him, he sure deserved it after all the awful things he had said about her.


	13. Chapter 13

When she woke up, she was annoyed about the fact that it was only Wednesday. If she wanted to talk with Draco before too much time passed, she couldn’t wait till the weekend. What worried her was that Draco wouldn’t talk with her after she ignored him the previous night, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t try. As soon as classes were over for the day, she headed down to Draco’s room.

Throughout the day, she had prepared herself for the moment where she would stand outside his room. She had even prepared a list of things they had to discuss, but once she stood outside his room, she found it difficult to knock on his door.

Taking a deep breath she lifted her hand and was about to knock when the door suddenly opened and Draco almost crashed into her. Hermione gasped and Draco took a step back. Draco was staring at her without saying a word, making her feel like she was the most horrible person in the world.

“Draco, I’ve come to talk.” She could see that Draco didn’t like the fact that she was there, but he didn’t turn her down. He took another step back and walked into his living area. Hermione entered his place and closed the door behind her. She had seen his living area only once before, and only for ten seconds.

“Be quick, I’ve got to be somewhere soon.” She knew she didn’t deserve much after she had ignored him the previous night so she didn’t comment.

“I didn’t mean to be rude yesterday. It’s just that I hadn’t planned to tell anyone about it yet, so when the news was out, I was in a shock.” She bit her lip nervously. 

“Do you know how it feels to hear about this from my students? How could you not tell me? Were you planning on hiding it for the rest of my life?” Hermione knew she deserved it, but she wasn’t about to lie down and take it.

“I wasn’t planning on keeping it away from you the rest of your life, stop thinking that I’m such a mean witch.” The word witch didn’t have the same meaning as the muggle context; she could only hope he understood it. “I can’t deny that I hoped I’d be able to keep it away from you and everybody for a longer time.”

“Do you really think that little of me?” he sighed. 

“No, I think that little of myself.”

“What happened is nothing to be ashamed of. I care for you deeply. Do you really think I would be angry at you because you got pregnant?”He seemed deeply offended at the thought.

“I’m not really that ashamed of what happened between us. The reason why I wanted to wait was because I can’t be sure you’re the father.” Draco’s pleading eyes turned cold as he stared at her. Hermione knew he wouldn’t like the truth, but she couldn’t keep him in the dark anymore. She tried her best to avoid crying. Telling him the truth would be much harder if she couldn’t hold herself together.

“When?”he asked. 

“The day before Christmas day.” 

“I thought you broke up with him. Did you do it to have one last memory?” She hoped he wouldn’t ask why she did it, because she couldn’t lie to him. 

“No, I was drunk, and not in a mood to fight more than needed. I don’t know yet who the child belongs to, that is why I didn’t want anyone to know.” A pleading expression passed over her face. She really wanted him to understand. 

“Does Weasley know?” Hermione shook her head. “I have to leave now so I won’t be late. I do not excuse you for the pain you have caused. You could at least have told me that you would come and see me later when I was knocking on your door yesterday.”

“You weren’t behaving any better. What were you thinking when you called me all those nasty things?” She felt her anger as it grow, making her wish she could punch him again. 

“I’m sorry I was rude,” he said sadly. “I was angry that you hadn’t told me.”

“If your anger is a valid excuse, then the uncertainty of the father of my child is my valid excuse. You hurt my feelings and made me feel awful. I did not decide to keep the child so I could be bullied by you or Ron,” she said, staring hard at him. “I don’t really want the child to belong to Ron since he has turned into such a power hungry man. He made me believe I was the one who ruined our relationship, because I didn’t care about him. He tried to convince me that he wasn’t flirting on his date the day you and I ended up sleeping together. I don’t see how I could have missed that, or all the times at work when I saw how brutal he was, but I’m not going to allow him to break me anymore. It hurts me to think that you’re not any better than him.” 

As much as it to think about it, she knew Ron had turned into a man she didn’t want to have a family with, which was why the decision to keep the child was so much harder. If she could, she would have run away and hidden until the child was born, only then deciding if she should tell people or not.

“How dare you compare me with that lowlife creep?”he nearly yelled. 

“I dare it easily enough after all the things you called me yesterday. Now, if you will excuse me, I don’t want to keep you from your other engagements.” She was about to leave when she was brutally stopped by Draco. He grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her mouth. When they parted, Hermione found it difficult to breathe.

“Hermione, please don’t leave in anger,” he pleaded. “I sincerely apologize for the things I said yesterday, I had no right. You must understand that I will do everything for you, for you and this child.”

“Even if he turns out to be a Weasley?” Draco was silent, which was enough of an answer for Hermione. “I must be going.” She easily broke out of his arms and left the room. 

When she stood outside his room she felt exhausted. Slowly, she walked up to her own room and locked herself in it. She looked at the piles of tests she still had to grade, but decided she would much rather sleep.

She must have been pretty tired because when she woke up, Minerva was standing above her. “Hermione,” the headmistress said quite worried. “Are you feeling alright?” Hermione blinked a few times and looked around the room. It was brighter than she remembered.

“I think so, why?”

“You have missed the first hour of class today.” When she realized what had happened, she sat quickly up in her bed and prepared herself to stand up. “Don’t worry, one of the other teachers took charge of your class. Neville tried to enter your room earlier to see if anything was up, but he couldn’t get in.”

“I forgot to tell him about the new password,” she confessed, fearing he was out of his mind when he couldn’t get in. Again, she tried to move out of bed, and Minerva stopped her for the second time.

“I took the liberty of giving you this day off. I’m sure you need it after the racket of the good news.” Hermione knew she was referring to the baby.

“I think I should get up anyways and see Madame Pomfrey. I’ve been feeling extremely tired lately.” She yawned in emphasis. 

“I’m sure she knows just what you need.” The two women sat and discussed children for the next hour. Hermione thought was really nice to finally be able to chat with someone who knew about children.

Madame Pomfrey gave her one of her well known energy restoring potions. As soon as Hermione drank it, she felt her energy being restored to her. Once she was back in her room she sat down in her living area to grade the tests she hadn’t finished the previous night. If Minerva had seen here then, she would scold her for not resting, but how could she relax when she couldn’t get Draco out of her mind?

Hermione thought she would be able to talk to Draco the next day, but she didn’t see him at breakfast, and he didn’t answer her when she knocked on his door. She thought of using the emergency password, but refused to lower herself to his level. When she didn’t see him during the weekend she became worried, but not enough in order to go to Minerva and ask where he might be.

It turned out Draco had taken a short holiday and would be back Monday morning. When Hermione looked at him, she thought he looked tired, but decided not to say anything since he was the one ignoring her. The only thing she could do was hope that he wasn’t at all like Ron and would eventually tell her what was bothering him.

She thought she could wait till he finally spoke to her, but when she read the Daily Prophet later that evening she couldn’t keep her tongue. Throwing the paper against the wall she rapidly stood up and ran out of her room.

While looking around for Draco, she noticed him walking away from the school, towards Hogsmeade. She would not allow him to run away now that she knew just what was going on. Angry, she ran towards him, needing to stop him before he got too far away from the school.

“How dare you accuse me for lying to you when you have been deceiving me!” He stopped immediately once he heard her and turned around. “How could you sleep with me when you are engaged?!” She wanted to cry, but more than anything, she wanted to hit him with a nasty hex.

“How did you find out?” She was shocked he didn’t even try to deny it.

“What do you have to say to your defence?”

“Hermione, it’s not like it seems,” he said. 

“No? Look into my eyes and tell me you’re not engaged,” she challenged. 

“I am, but it’s not like you think!” His brow furrowed as he stared at her. 

“How can an engagement not be as I think? Either you are or not, and you definitely are.”

“It’s arranged.” She thought he might have a sad story that she wouldn’t believe, engaged to a woman he disliked, and he would end it soon, instead she got a sad story that she did believe. “We have kept it a secret for years because it’s not something we want to go through with.”

“You’re still engaged,” she added. 

“And you still don’t know who the father is. Everybody makes mistakes Hermione, everybody has secrets. I did not mean for you to find out, not because I didn’t want to tell you, but because we’re working on a way to end our engagement.” She had completely forgotten about her own problems when she had discovered his engagement and had to look away in shame.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have accused you like I did,” she apologized. 

Draco walked closer to Hermione and grabbed her hands before he kissed each of them. Hermione stared at him and couldn’t help the tingly feeling that grew inside of her. Slowly, his kisses travelled down her arms and reached her wrists. While he was softly kissing her, she couldn’t help gasping in excitement.

She was sure that if she allowed him to continue, they would need a room. As hard as it was for her, she pulled her hands out of his grip. “I know I shouldn’t even care since we’re not together, but when I discovered you hid something from me I suddenly saw red.”

“You have the right to know, because I want to be with you,” he said quietly. 

“Don’t be ridiculous. You don’t want to be with me now, since I’m pregnant.” When she discovered he had left the school grounds, she had been sure it was because she was pregnant and had accepted that he didn’t want to stay with her. 

“Why don’t I tell you what I have been doing since last week? Helena and I went to meet lawyers who might help us out of this agreement. We think we might have a way out, but it will be a long and tiresome process for all of us.” He sighed. “If you hadn’t come into the picture, we wouldn’t have bothered about finding a way to end our engagement for another year or so, since neither of us was seeing anyone. Hermione, I want to be with you, both.” He placed one hand on her stomach, causing her to hold her breath. “I’ll be thrilled if the child is mine, and if it’s a Weasley then we’ll bleach his hair blonde and say he’s still mine.” As he spoke she got butterflies in her stomach, he really wanted to be with her. 

“Are you serious? I don’t want to be with you if you’re going to change your mind in the future. My decision has to be the best for this child.” But she secretly wanted him to say yes no matter what. Hope spread in her belly. 

“I’m serious. There is nobody else that I would rather be with,” he assured her. “Now let us get you in before you freeze to death.” Hermione smiled, she didn’t think Draco liked her that much, but now she was convinced. Draco had transformed into a wonderful and caring man, and he had made her believe they might have a future together.

As lovely the thought of their own family was, she knew he might still change his mind. Maybe if the child did turn out to be Ron’s, he would run. She would have to think about that problem later, when she wasn’t as happy as right then.


	14. Chapter 14

It took two weeks before the news finally reached Ron. Hermione was in class with the sixth year Ravenclaws and Gryffindors when someone knocked on her door. Filch stuck his head inside and told her that the Headmistress wanted to see her. Because there were only fifteen minutes left of the class, she ordered the chalk to write down the homework for the students before allowing them to leave for the day.

She wondered what the Headmistress wanted. It wasn’t normal to call a teacher out of class, especially not when the class was still in session. Nervous that something bad had happened, she knocked on Minerva’s door. The door was brutally opened and Ron stood in front of her. She knew at once that he wasn’t in a good mood.

She thought that he would start by saying something rude, but instead he stepped away from the door and allowed her to enter. Hermione wondered why, but chose not to comment, especially since Minerva was sitting by her desk.

“Mr Weasley said he had an urgent matter to discuss with you and that it couldn’t wait until the end of class.” Hermione stared at her feet while trying to control her anger. Ron knew well enough that she hated missing class, even as a teacher. “If you wish, you can use my spare office.” Ron didn’t even wait for her to finish before he walked into the direction she was pointing in.

Once they were alone, Ron found his wand and put an extra privacy spell on the room. She thought it was stupid since the room most likely was already silenced, but chose not to comment once again. Ron did not like to be corrected.

“Did you hate me so much that you chose not to tell me about the pregnancy?” he started, immediately getting to the matter at hand. 

“Even if I hated you, I would have told you.”

“Then why am I finding this out from Harry?” Neville had probably told Luna, who told Ginny who told Harry. It had always been like that between them.

“You’d better sit down,” Hermione started, preparing herself and conjuring a chair.

“Don’t tell me what to do! I demand you tell me why you chose not to tell me, especially since you just informed me you would have told me.” he snarled. 

“It’s more complicated than that.” She found it extremely difficult to tell him the reason why she’d kept things quiet. “You remember the day we met in the Hogsmeade? When I went back to school, I was heartbroken when I thought about you flirting with others.”

“You’re still using that against me? I thought you had more brains than that Hermione, I’ve never flirted with anyone.” She chose again not to say anything, she knew what she’d seen had been real. Nothing he said would change her mind.

“When I got back I was crying, and not aware of what was going on around me. Draco came and comforted me, and it ended up with us in the bed together. I don’t know who the father is, and therefore, I kept quiet for a long time.” She watched him closely and could see that he was disgusted, before his anger came back.

“I never thought you would ever behave like a slut, Hermione. I’ve known for a while now that you can’t be trusted, this only confirms my belief.” She was shocked at the words he’d used and knew at once that her decision to break their relationship had been for the best. “Mark my words! if it’s mine I’ll do everything in my power to get custody of it.” 

If she hadn’t been so shocked, she would have said something. She could feel her heart being ripped apart. Suddenly the floor seemed to spin, making it difficult for her to stand. In order not to fall, she leaned against the wall and closed her eyes. 

“If it belongs to that fucking Death Eater, I hope you’ll live happily ever after. Not that you deserve it after you cheated and broke everything off with me in order to stay with him.” He glared at her menacingly. 

“I-” she started to say only to lose her voice. She had no idea what to say to him. She wasn’t even sure she did want to say anything. What she wanted was for him to leave and never come back. She did not like to live with threats.

“What? You didn’t break up with me because of him? You never intended to sleep with him and therefore I should forgive you? I don’t think so.” Still angry, he walked out of the room, said his goodbye to Minerva, and left. Hermione wasn’t sure how long she stood there, propping herself against the wall, when Minerva finally entered the room.

“Good gracious, what’s wrong?” The older woman gasped when she saw the state Hermione was in. Minerva then helped her over to a sofa she’d conjured, before she went back into her office. She returned seconds later, comforting her by telling her she had called on Madame Pomfrey.

“Can you please ask someone to step in for me for the rest of the day?” Hermione asked, unsure if she was heard or not.

“Of course, I was going to suggest it myself.” The two women didn’t have another chance to talk before Poppy came and examined her. After she gave Hermione the same energy potion she’d given her before, and they’d gotten her back to her room, she handed Hermione a sleeping potion, and an order to stay in bed as long as she was able to stay. 

The sleeping potion wasn’t strong because she was pregnant, and because of that, it took her a longer time to fall asleep. While she lay there, she thought about Ron and how he had threatened to take her child away if it turned out to be his. For the first time since she’d discovered she was pregnant, she wished she had aborted it at once.

The next time she woke up, it was night outside and the clock showed midnight. She tried to sit up, but fell down soon after from exhaustion. Not wanting to lay in bed, she grabbed one of the tiny vials with the energy potion Poppy had made for her. While she waited for it to take effect, she thought back at what Ron threatened to do.

She hadn’t been able to speak earlier because of the shock, but now she was well rested and her mind could easily process the information. Ron was mistaken if he thought he could take the baby from her. She had several friends that were witnesses of his cruelty, so he could never convince any judge to give him the custody. If he had a slight chance of winning, she would make sure that that chance was burned to the ground. She might have quit her job at the Ministry, but she had one of the best. She had just gotten tired of her job. Because of her knowledge, she could easily beat him. Ron knew this as well, so she didn’t understand why he had even felt the need to threaten her.

Her energy eventually returned, so she stood up from bed and walked into her living area. She was about to walk over to the bookshelf when she realized she wasn’t alone. On the sofa sat a sleeping blond. Hermione smiled when she saw the strange position he sat in. His head was up against the back of the sofa, almost falling down onto his shoulder. His mouth was slightly open, his arms lay in a strange position, and he was slightly snoring. If she told him that he snored, he would probably deny it and call her a liar.

She wasn’t sure where their relationship was going, but she wanted to be with him right then, especially after the scare Ron had given her. Quietly, she sat down next to him and softly caressed his cheek while calling out his name. It took the Slytherin approximately ten seconds to realize that someone was next to him, and another ten seconds before he realized just who it was.

“Hermione, how are you feeling?” he said in a grungy voice. Hermione couldn’t help giggling.

“I’m great.” She could see how sceptical he was.

“Based on what I heard, you’re not great at all. Please tell me what happened.” Suddenly, she felt uncomfortable sitting there. It wasn’t right that he should know about her problems with Ron, especially since they most likely wouldn’t stay together in the future.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she compensated. 

“I don’t know what you’re used to, but I’m not the kind that ignores problems.” He was the complete opposite of Ron, who would rather pretend nothing was wrong than acknowledge even a tiny problem. She wanted to refuse again, only to realize how wrong it was. She did not want to have another relationship where they chose not to speak with each other. Her parents had always talked if something bothered them, and so should she.

“Ron discovered I’m pregnant and decided to come straight over and call me out of class. I don’t know how much you know about our relationship, or how he has become, but he thinks he’s in charge and always better than others,” she explained.

“I know. I still haven’t forgotten how he enjoyed telling me he was higher up in the system than I am. Just wish he could have left my father out of it.” Her anger for Ron grew as she realized just how unfair he had been. She had known at the time that he had crossed the line, but she had no idea just how far until she saw Draco’s pain flash in his eyes as he sat in front of her. 

“He wasn’t happy at all when I told him about you. He called me nasty things and said that if the child was his he would take it from me.”

“That bastard! He really thinks he is something just because he’s an Auror. I can’t understand how he hasn’t been fired yet, or why no one has reported him. If he thinks he can come here and threaten you then he’s got another thing coming his way! I might not have the same power as before, but my family still has money.” He was seething by the time he’d finished talking. 

“Please don’t do anything,” she begged. “I know he doesn’t deserve kindness, but I don’t want you to lower yourself to his level.” Draco seemed to be battling with himself, but in the end, he agreed not to do anything unless Ron attacked him first.

Even though Hermione had slept for hours and had taken the energy potion, she was still becoming tired and had to go to bed an hour later. She then slept for seven hours. When she woke up in the morning she still felt tired, most likely it was because she had been sleeping for long enough.

When she went down to breakfast, Minerva placed her hand over Hermione’s and said, “Poor girl, I wish you the best luck in the world,” before she went back to her breakfast. Hermione wasn’t sure what she knew, she could only hope the woman didn’t know all her secrets. Later that day when she met Draco, he confessed telling Minerva about the confusing circumstance of the baby’s paternal identity. She wanted to be mad at him for it but she discovered that she couldn’t. He wasn’t out to hurt her, after all. With a careful smile, she forgave him, and they were once again good friends - with benefits.


	15. Chapter 15

The days passed and became months. 

Hermione wished she could say that she was happy, both because of the pregnancy and her relationship with Draco, but she had never felt worse. Not even during the war when Ron had left did she feel as bad as when she was pregnant. Her energy level was always low, she kept taking the potions Madame Pomfrey made her, but after a while it lost its effect. She had to ask if someone could take over her class several times. She also worried too much, especially about the day Draco would realize he didn’t want to be with her and broke off their relationship. He always managed to calm her down because he declared his feelings for her every day and kissed her until she didn’t have any breath left.

Before she knew it, the school year was over and she was free to leave. Because she didn’t have a place of her own, Draco offered her to live with him, something she refused. She still wasn’t sure why she didn’t want to admit to herself that she liked him a lot, but she didn’t want to complicate things further in case Draco did decide to leave.

Luckily for her, she found an apartment in a wizard area of Birmingham and moved in as soon as possible. The days she was able to leave her apartment she visited her friends, either Draco, Luna, Ginny, or Neville. The other days, where she didn’t have any energy to spare, she ended up resting on the sofa, and sometimes she didn’t even get out of bed. The energy loss was more frequent, and she ended up being at home more than visiting her friends.

It wasn’t until late July that she knew something was wrong. The baby was fine, growing and thriving, but she was feeling drained and more so than normal. One morning, she reached out to find her wand to call for help when suddenly she blacked out.

When she woke up again, she noted that she had been gone for two hours. Knowing that it wasn’t normal, she quickly found her wand and sent out a message. She continued to lie in bed in the same position, fearing another blackout, when Draco ran into the room. She could see that he was extremely worried and regretted sending a danger message.

“Hermione! What happened?” he asked, panicked. 

“Please don’t freak out, I’m sure it’s not that bad,” she consoled tiredly. 

“How can I not freak out? Tell me what happened!”

“I don’t feel that well, more exhausted than normal, and I blacked out for two hours,” Hermione explained. 

“Nothing bad? Blacking out is not normal. What did the healer say about your health?” Hermione felt embarrassed because she still hadn’t switched from the muggle doctor to a healer.

“I’m not seeing a healer, I’m actually going to a muggle doctor.” She blushed. 

“Magic health is not the same as muggle health, Hermione; you of all people should know that. Magic can heal muggles, but not the other way around. I’m taking you to St. Mungos at once.” She wanted to refuse, but couldn’t do a thing to stop him, especially when she couldn’t even sit up in her own bed.

When they arrived at St. Mungos, Hermione was guided into her own private room where a healer took several tests. Hermione had no idea what she would find, but didn’t believe it would be that bad, until she saw the shocked expression on her face.

“How long have you been feeling tired Miss Granger?” She tried to think but found it to be tiresome.

”I know it’s been going on for the last two months, so I’m guessing more than two months.” It was Draco who answered for her.

“Oh my, that is not good at all,” the healer muttered. 

“What do you mean?” Hermione could hear that Draco was worried.

“She has something called Adficio Navitas. Shortly translated, it means the fetus is draining her energy. It should be easily fixed.” She left the two alone to find the required potion.

“You see, you don’t need to worry,” Hermione said, trying to calm Draco. When he grabbed her hand and sat down next to her on the bed, she smiled. He really cared for her. Sadly, she still wouldn’t allow herself to feel more, in case he would run away anytime soon.

“That’s not the point. You should have come here since you first discovered you were pregnant.” They didn’t have a chance to continue when the healer entered the room again. She smiled at them before she handed Hermione a potion. Hermione smiled back and took the vial and drank it at once.

When the entire potion was consumed, she realized something wasn’t right. Her whole body turned ice cold and her back started to hurt. She turned towards the witch to tell her what happened when suddenly pain shot through her. The only thing she could do was to scream. She felt someone try to hold her down and talk to her, but she couldn’t hear what they said because of all the screaming. 

While in that state someone must have poured some liquid into her mouth because she felt like she was drowning. Slowly, the pain stopped and she was able to lie still without feeling like someone was poking her with hot metal. She felt something cold against her lips and heard the witch tell her to drink. It must have been a sleeping potion because the next thing she knew was that her body was relaxed and darkness closed around her.

Later that day, she woke up and saw Draco sitting in a chair next to her bed with his head resting on the bed. She soon realized he was sleeping, which meant he must have been sitting there for a long time. She placed her hand on top of his head and watched him wake up. She loved the cute way he was trying to rub away the tiredness from his eyes.

“How are you feeling?” he asked nervously.

“Fine, you?”

“You shouldn’t worry about me.” Hermione had forgotten what had happened right before she slept. Slowly her memory came back and made her wonder.

“What happened?” She could see that Draco didn’t want to tell her. He stared at the bed, pressing his lips together, like he was afraid he would accidentally spill something.

“You had a reaction to the potion the healer gave you. She had to give you another one to neutralize it before you finally calmed down. It turns out the fetus isn’t draining you for energy, but magic.” Hermione stared at him and wondered how it was possible, but knew better than to deny the possibility of such an illness.

“What will happen?” She thought she knew. It wasn’t difficult to figure out what would happen if someone was draining her magic. 

“If they aren’t able to stop it, you’ll most likely lose your magic and become a squib. They also said that if you’re completely tapped of energy and magic, it’s a big chance you’ll die, the child as well.” Hermione lowered her head, unable to think when she realized she could lose her life and the child’s at the same time.

“And there is nothing they can do?”she asked quietly.

“If they can find a donor, you can be saved, but it’s not often they find magic donors.” Hermione realized they were doomed unless the child didn’t drain her completely. “And not everyone can become a donor. They have to be strong and healthy. If anyone are sick or dying they’ll most likely die while donating the magic, and that often leads to complications for the one receiving the donation.”

“I should have aborted the child when I had a chance. I knew it would be problematic once I discovered who the father was, but I never thought it could be the death of me.” Draco sat down next to her in the bed and held her tightly in his arms, kissing her forehead before trying to get her mind on something else.


	16. Chapter 16

She thought that once they discovered what was wrong with her, she would be able to go home, but to her shock she wasn’t allowed to leave until after she had given birth. Hermione wanted to say that she was sure she wouldn’t survive and that she would much rather die at home, but knew it wouldn’t help her, so she ignored them instead.

“I heard you’re giving the healers a hard time.” Draco walked into her room the third time that day. “Why don’t you try and relax?”

“I don’t want to spend my last two months locked up in a room in a hospital,” she muttered angrily. 

“They said a few die, not everyone who has your illness.” Hermione stared at him, angry that he was taking their side.

“If I die, then you will regret forcing me to stay here.” She crossed her arms and stared at the book in front of her, unable to read a single word. All she could think about was how little time she had left. She knew the chance of surviving was much higher, but that didn’t mean she had to be positive about her future. 

“Please don’t say that. I don’t wish you to die.”

“I’m sure you never thought you would ever say that to me when we were young.” Hermione couldn’t help feeling even sadder when she thought about everything that had happened: Ron turning into a power sick monster and Draco becoming a caring wizard. Who would have thought?

“You’re right, I never thought I would say something like that. I also never thought you were such a caring and kind person.” Hermione smiled when he sat down next to her and pulled her into a hug. “Don’t dare to die, Hermione, I don’t think I can bear to lose you.”

“How can you say something like that? We haven’t even been together a year.”

“Don’t forget that we have known each other fourteen years. That is more than half my life,” he reminded her.

“Don’t you forget that you hated me for twelve of those years,” she shot back. 

“That’s not fair. And I didn’t hate you for twelve years, I hated you for five.” Hermione stared at him and wondered what had changed his mind.

“When did you realize you didn’t hate me?” She was eager to discover his past.

“I don’t know what date it was. I only know that at the end of our fifth year, I didn’t hate you that much. When school started again, I didn’t have the same hatred as before. I guess I had a lot on my mind that year.” Hermione knew exactly what he meant with ‘a lot on his mind’ and decided not to ask, not yet at least. He started telling her about the times he stared at her, how he thought her smile, her eyes, and even her hair was beautiful. She sat and listened to him when suddenly she felt tired and before she knew it she was consumed by darkness.


	17. Chapter 17

Draco sat beside an unconscious Hermione, holding her hand while she slept. In approximately two weeks, she would give birth, if she survived till then. Hermione had suggested that they could push forward the pregnancy so she wouldn’t be completely drained. The healers had apologized and had said that they had tried that with another patient and it experience didn’t have a happy ending. C-section wouldn’t work either. In some magical pregnancies the fetus is protected by magic, which means nothing you can do will harm it. The only thing they could do was to wait and hope the child wouldn’t deplete the last of her energy before its time.

His attention perked when Hermione moaned something. It was too low for him to make it out. When he gazed at her prone form, he couldn’t help feeling sad. In confidence, the healers said the situation didn’t look good and that sent him into a deep depression. He never put that side of himself on display when Hermione was awake. Only when she was sleeping did he allow his pain to show and his tears to flow. He did not want to lose her and would do everything in his power to save her. If anyone deserved to die it was him because of everything he had done in his life.

Hermione moaned again, the sound lasting longer this time, before she stopped. He knew she was in pain, even if she always assured him she was completely fine.

Someone was knocking on the door to notify them of their presence before entering. Draco didn’t bother paying much attention to who entered the room; all he cared about was Hermione. The newcomer walked over to the bed and stood next to where Draco was sitting.

“How is she?” Draco recognized Harry’s voice. He was glad Ginny wasn’t with him. The last time they had met, Draco had ended up throwing her out because she had been disturbing Hermione’s rest with her incessant crying. Harry did not appreciate Draco’s way of reacting and things had ended with more tears from Ginny, who had feared Draco would hurt Harry.

“Worse.” He heard a chair being pulled up to the bed next to him. Harry must have been planning to stay there for a long time.

“I talked with Ron.” Draco knew he never should have told him that he had wanted things to be friendlier between them; he couldn’t get rid of the Gryffindor now. “He rejected threatening her. I didn’t believe him.”

“You came here to tell me that?”

“No, I came to tell you that Ron is suspended. He threatened someone high up in the system and that man reported Ron.” He didn’t need to look over to see that Harry was shaking his head. “When the word got out, several of his co-workers came out and reported him as well. The Ministry has opened up a case and will investigate him and see who else might have been threatened or treated badly.”

“I don’t mean to sound rude or something, but I couldn’t care less. His future doesn’t change Hermione’s,” Draco stated. 

“I just thought you might want some good news.” Draco chose not to answer. “You don’t need to sit here all the time you know.”

“No? What am I supposed to do if I don’t sit here?”

“Take a walk, or talk with someone,” Harry suggested. 

“Those things mean nothing to me anymore.” His tone was emotionless. “I know it might seem stupid, but if she dies then I don’t think I’ll be able to live my life like before.” This time it was Harry’s turn to stay quiet. He apparently had not expected Draco to say something like that.

“I’m sure she will survive this. She has always been strong.” He figured Harry was trying to be reassuring. 

“You’re stupid if you believe that. Every test so far shows that her health is deteriorating. Not one of the healers believes she will survive the birth, if she lives till then.” They continued to sit in silence for ten minutes before Harry left. When the door closed behind him, Draco allowed his head to rest on the bed. He wasn’t aware of it, but slowly his eyes closed and he fell asleep.

When he woke up next, he felt something stroking his head. When he sat up he realized it was Hermione.

“When did you wake up?”The sun was shining directly into his eyes, blinding him.

“Oh, I don’t know, five minutes ago,” she responded slowly.

“And you didn’t wake me up?”

“You looked so peaceful.” Draco leaned closer to her and kissed her. It hurt to think that she wasn’t going to live for much longer, that was why he wanted to spend every second she was awake with her.

“So what do you want to do today?” he asked, putting on a brave smile. 

“How long do you think I can stay awake?” she questioned quietly.

“I’m guessing around four hours.” Draco stared at her, focusing on how she was glowing, especially when the sun was shining directly on her. “Harry was here yesterday evening.”

“Aw, and I didn’t get to meet him!”

“He came with good news.” She stretched her legs out of the bed, preparing herself for the daily walk.

“What good news?”

“Apparently several people have reported your ex. He’s been suspended.”

“I don’t like him, but I fail to see just how that is good news.” Draco raised his brow at the strange comment. He feared the draining of her energy and magic might be affecting her mind.

“If they drop the charges, he still won’t be able to take the child, in case it is his. Being reported by as many people as he was destroyed every chance for him.” 

When she realized how good the news actually was she smiled. “I guess that is good news.” Draco wanted to say that it was extremely good news. Finally, the Weasley’s had a black sheep.

For the next hours, Draco and Hermione took a walk, within the hospital walls of course, and discussed the past, present, and future. After three hours and twenty minutes had passed, Hermione felt ill and had to lie down. Almost thirty minutes earlier than the previous day. The healers feared she wouldn’t be able to wake up in the end.


	18. Chapter 18

The days were long for Draco, who sat beside Hermione for more than twenty hours a day, waiting for her to wake up. A week after the news about Weasley’s misfortune, Hermione could barely stay awake more than an hour. Draco knew something had to be done. She wouldn’t survive till the due date if she couldn’t wake up.

He spent hours with specialists, trying to see if they might know of any way to save her. The only thing they knew of was a magical donor. Sadly there were too few names on the donor list, and the ones that were willing to give away their magic had already chosen the ones they would give it to. Draco knew that requesting they trade places would be selfish of him, even if he hated to lose Hermione.

It took him two long days to realize what he had to do, and as much as he hated the thought of it, he knew he had to try. If he didn’t try Hermione would most likely die, and then he would kill himself. If she survived, he would be extremely happy, but he knew well enough the chances for her surviving were close to zero. If he went through with his plan, Hermione would most likely live, and so would the child. He would live a miserable life, but with her there nothing would be too hard. There was also a chance of things ending completely differently. Hermione might live, and he would die. If that happened, he did not know how she would survive.

Whatever the end would be, his mind was made up. The only thing he had to do was to inform the healers.

Three days later on Monday the 6th September, Hermione moaned in her sleep. She continued like that for another hour before she finally woke up.

“Draco, what’s going on?” she asked helplessly. The healer that was standing next to Hermione explained what was going on, and what she should expect. Draco had told her not to tell Hermione about his plan, in case she tied to change his mind.

“It’s time,” he said, unable to hide how worried he actually was. A healer entered the room with pain reliving potions for Hermione. Draco was glad she would get something for the pain. He watched anxiously as Hermione drank the potion. The healers warned him that her body might refuse the potion, and if that happened, her chance of survival would be greatly reduced.

One she calmed down, Draco sat down next to her and held her hand. He had to be ready for the moment when she was the most weak in order to transfer his magic. The same healer that had given Hermione the potion handed him a potion as well. It was a golden liquid with dark strains floating through it.

The healer with the potion stood in front of them and started the transfer of magic.

“What is she doing?” Hermione asked when she realized something was going on. She took deep breathes to control the contractions while the healer continued.

“It’s a special spell, we hope it might save you,” he lied.

Five minutes passed before the spell was ready. Draco took one look at Hermione and hoped it wouldn’t be the last time he saw her. He leaned in and kissed her, making sure he never released her hand. If that happened, they had to start over again.

“I love you,” he whispered in her ear before he drank the potion.

The magic began its work from the instant the potion touched his tongue. While the magic transfer wasn’t a painful experience, it would leave him drained. He was painfully conscious of the fact that his magic was binding their hands together, most likely to keep the bond from breaking. “Draco,” Hermione said nervously between her deep breaths. “What’s going on?”

He would have answered her if his magic wasn’t leaving him at that moment, pulling at him until he thought he was floating above the chair. He let his head fall back against the chair and closed his eyes. The magic started to travel from his body towards Hermione’s hand. He felt her magic and how it became stronger the more of his magic she received.

While his eyes were closed, he thought back at his past and how he wished he could undo most of the bad things he had done. He knew that by saving Hermione’s life, he might get redemption for some of the things he had done.

At least, he hoped.

He wasn’t sure how long the transaction lasted. He wasn’t even able to move or open his eyes. He heard the healers say something and Hermione calling out his name before she screamed out in pain. He wanted to open his eyes and comfort Hermione, but as hard as he tried, he wasn’t able to move.

He could feel the last drop of magic leave him, how it clung to his hand before it was brutally removed. He felt vulnerable and empty.

Before he could think any further, his mind slowly stopped functioning and he fell into a dark place, a place he felt like he would never wake up from. The last thing he saw before he fell into a deep sleep was Hermione’s beautiful face.

Hermione was in shock. She stared at Draco’s limp body and at the healers that were standing around them. She thought it was strange that none of them reacted. Surely it wasn’t normal to pass out like he had.

One of the healers tried to calm her down, but nothing the woman said helped. Hermione tried again to call out Draco’s name and like before she received no answer, not even a small movement in response.

“He didn’t want to tell you in case you would talk him out of it, but he decided to transfer his magic to you in order to save you and the child.” When the healer told her the truth, a sadness that she never felt before filled her. The magic bond that held their hands together was broken, but she refused to release him. She knew something had happened when she had suddenly felt stronger when Draco closed his eyes. She knew he had done something but had never thought he would give up his whole life for her.

Another healer tried to convince her to release him and after several seconds she had to allow them to take him away. Luckily they only moved him over to a bed they had rolled into the room.

She continued to stare at him until the moment they told her to lie down and push. The nightgown she was wearing was sticking to her body, making her uncomfortable. She did everything they told her, breathe, relax, push, and before she knew it, she only had to push one last time. Right before she obeyed, she took one last look at Draco, who had woken up it seemed.

His head was tilted to the side and his eyes were slightly open. Tears filled her eyes as she smiled at him before pushing one last time.

Once her cries had died down, the room was filled with another kind of scream. Hermione smiled as she lay down on the bed and closed her eyes. It was over, she had survived, and so had the child. And by the looks of it Draco was alive as well.

Her mind was calm and her body heavy. All she wanted to do right then was to sleep forever.


	19. Chapter 19

When Hermione woke up, she felt calmer than she had in a long time. She opened her eyes and wondered if she was dead. Harry had told her what happened to him when he offered his life to Voldemort. 

The room she was laying in was white. The sun was shining through the windows, blinding her. She felt the wind on her face and a white curtain was slightly fluttering in front of the window. Everything seemed so surreal.

Once she opened her eyes wider, she knew she wasn’t dead. She could then that she was still in St Mungo’s.

It took her a few seconds to realize that two major things were missing. Draco was not by her side and she did not have a baby inside of her anymore. Instantly, she feared the worst. Draco had died because of the magic donation and the baby hadn’t survived the birth.

She was about to move out of bed, when the door opened. Hermione stopped and stared at the person standing in the doorway. It was Draco he was holding something very tiny in his arms. Her heart exploded with love when she realized that they were still alive.

“You’re wake,” Draco said quite happily. Hermione studied his face. It was as beautiful as always. If anything was wrong, she would have known it just by looking at him, but since he was happy she could easily relax.

“What happened?” She could recall most of the events that had occurred, at least up until she heard the baby screaming. She must have fallen asleep because she couldn’t remember a thing after that, only darkness.

“You were extremely tired, so you fell asleep. They decided to give you a sleeping potion so you would gain as much energy as possible before waking up. You’ve been asleep for a day.” He walked next to her and sat down beside her. She stared at the bundle in his arms, and could easily see a tiny nose sticking up out of the blankets.

“Who does it belong to?” she found herself asking, worried that he hadn’t discovered it yet and would leave her as soon as it turned out the child was Ron’s.

“It’s yours,” he responded easily.

Hermione wanted to hit him for joking about something that was so important to her. “Draco,” she stared warningly.

He smiled before he removed the top layer of blankets from around the baby. “It’s mine.” Hermione could finally breathe out. Draco leaned over to her and kissed her forehead before he handed the baby over to her.

She couldn’t help staring at the child, the tiny nose, the tiny eyes, and the tiny mouth. It was so tiny and helpless. “What is it?”

“A boy,” Draco answered. Hermione stared at the baby and wondered what to name him. Some people waited a few weeks before naming their child; others knew it before they even became pregnant. Hermione had chosen to wait till the day she gave birth.

As she looked up at Draco, she knew at once what to call it. She knew well enough she didn’t have to, but she didn’t see any harm in it. “I wonder if you’ll allow me to call him Lucius.” Draco smiled at her before he kissed her.

“I would very much like that and I’m sure father will appreciate it as well. It seemed like he brightened up when I told him he was a grandfather.” Hermione felt sad for the future of the elder Malfoy.

“Did you tell him about what you did to save me?” She hadn’t forgotten about the sacrifice he made.

“No, and I hope he will never hear about it, since he won’t like the idea of his son as a squib.” Hermione agreed with him. “He hopes he can see the baby while we’re still here and you as well.” She stared at him in shock. It was clearly a lie. The few times she’d seen Lucius Malfoy after the war, he had done everything in his power to avoid her.

“He does?” she asked, just to make sure she hadn’t been mistaken.

“Yes. He said he needs to put the past behind him if he wants to see his grandson.” She smiled. Already, good things were starting to happen. The only thing she wasn’t sure of was how Draco would be able to live as a squib.

“How will you live without magic?” she asked tentatively. 

“I don’t know. But with you by my side, I’m sure I’ll learn how to handle myself.” She doubted he would like the muggle way of doing things and feared he would blame her in the end. “I love you, Hermione. I did it to save you and our son. I don’t want you to worry about me. Just promise me that if I ever feel depressed about my lack of magic, that you will try your best to remind me why I did it. Even if you have to slap me.” 

They shared another kiss before the baby, Lucius the Second, decided it was time for food. Draco kissed her one last time and told her he loved her before she lay down to feed the child. As strange her life had gotten, she finally felt normal.


	20. Chapter 20

Epilogue 

Almost eleven years later, Hermione, Draco, and Lucius the Second drove through the countryside towards their home. They had been on a trip to Diagon Alley to purchase the needed supplies for Lucius for his first day of school.

Hermione and Draco could not be prouder when Lucius had received his letter. Draco had instantly went through the list of what he would need, planning their trip to London. Hermione couldn’t help giggling at the eagerness she saw in Draco, the way he almost glowed when he had told Lucius about all the fun he would have at Hogwarts, and about all the friends he would make, and possibly his future wife. The last was not appreciated by a soon to be eleven year old boy, who loved pirates, Quidditch, and fencing. 

As Draco pulled into their driveway, they tried to act as normal as possible because they knew a secret that they didn’t want Lucius to discover, yet. Luckily, Lucius was too excited about the idea of going away to a magical school, that he didn’t pay attention to what was going around him.

Hermione looked over at Draco and smiled, he did the same. They had been through both good and bad times, but had always managed to find a solution to their problems. It had taken them more than a year to figure out which kind of lifestyle suited them and it was the muggle way. It took them just as long to finally end Draco’s engagement with Helen. In their home they still had wizard appliances, but their house was filled with less magic than a normal wizarding home. Draco learned how electricity worked, and eventually he learned to drive, since brooms needed more magic than he had.

They discovered that he hadn’t lost all types of magic. He could live long and he still had the ability to see magical places. A few times he even said he felt magic, something only wizards, witches and other beings with magic could do. They only chance Draco had to have magic again was if someone was willing to donate their magic to him. 

Lucius jumped out of the car and ran towards their home, returning instantly when Hermione called him to help them with the grocery bags. When all the bags were out of the car, Hermione, Draco, and Lucius walked towards their home. Once they entered the house, their friends and family jumped out from hiding and shouted surprise.

Lucius stared at the crowd, unable to understand why they were there. Hermione and Draco knew that if they didn’t celebrate his birthday before he went away, they wouldn’t have the chance to do it until Christmas holiday and they were not able to wait that long.

Their living room was filled with Weasleys, Potters, Lovegoods, Longbottoms, Malfoys, and a bunch of other friends. The only thing that was missing Lucius Sr., who had died two years previously. To everybody’s surprise, he had lived much longer than anyone had expected. What shocked them even more was how well he accepted the fact that his only son had turned into a squib and his daughter-in-law was a muggleborn. He would gladly have given his magic to Draco, but because of his illness, he wouldn’t have even survived the first two seconds of the transfer of magic. 

Hermione stared at everybody in the room before her eyes concentrated on Lucius. “It feels like it was yesterday I held him for the first time.” Hermione’s eyes started to burn, warning her that if she didn’t calm down, she would start to cry. 

ʺLife moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.ʺ Draco replied.

As Lucius the Second walked around the house, greeting and thanking everybody, Hermione smiled. When Draco came up behind her and put his arms around her, kissing her neck lightly, she thought of just how lucky she was, to have such a caring husband and a wonderful family. “I love you,” he whispered, making her life even more amazing than it already was.


End file.
